Interesting facts about family life. The most unusual families. Largest number of monogamous marriages
Culture
Some describe marriage as a union between two people in love who give each other vows of eternal love and fidelity. However, such a definition can be given to modern marriage. In the past, the concept of “marriage” was much different from the modern one.
Although marriage has ancient roots, only comparatively Recently, love between partners in most cases has become an integral part of it.
Previously, marriage was not associated with the relationship between a man and a woman. His goal was to create unions, expand the family's labor resources, and leave offspring. In some cultures this trend has continued to this day However, living in a civilized modern society, we are accustomed to the fact that marriage means something completely different.
Today no longer same-sex marriages are rare, which are legal in some countries. It is not surprising that the first country to officially allow the registration of such unions was Holland. Other countries followed: Belgium, Spain, Canada, South Africa, Norway and so on. A month ago I joined the list France, where Parliament approved the legalization of same-sex marriage.
Find out about the most interesting facts from the history of marriage, which has come a long way from polygamy to homosexual unions:
Strategic alliances
Marriage is a fairly ancient form of union between people, which originated at the dawn of humanity. Early forms of marriage were seen as strategic alliances between families, in which young people often had no rights. In some cultures, parents could even marry one of your children on the spirit of a deceased child to strengthen family ties.
Consanguineous marriages
Unions within the same family were quite common. The Bible says that the forefathers Isaac And Jacob were married to their cousins, and Abraham was the husband of his half-sister. Marriages between cousins remain common to this day. especially in the Middle East. Anthropologists also confirm that this phenomenon was common in the past.
Polygamous marriages
Monogamous marriages currently predominate throughout the world, but were more common in the past. polygamy. Many of the people described in the Bible are from Jacob to kings David And Solomon, had more than one wife. Men with high status always strived for polygamy.
Even today, statistics show that most men would not object to polygamy, if it were allowed. Only a few cultures allow a woman to have multiple husbands, and there are only a few examples of group marriages.
You don't have to have children
In many early cultures, a man could end his marriage or take another woman as his wife if if the first wife was infertile. Interestingly, if a couple did not have children, it was always the woman who was to blame. Early Christian church For the first time, she set the condition that married people must leave offspring.
If you can leave offspring, then you have to do it, says the church. However, church law allows that a marriage can be annulled if the man unable to sleep with his wife due to physical reasons.
Monogamous marriages
The reign of monogamy
Monogamous marriages began to dominate Western culture around 6th-9th centuries. Between Catholic Church and the old nobility witnessed a fairly long war for the right to nobility have several wives.
Ultimately, the church emerged victorious in this struggle, and by the 9th century, only monogamous unions were officially permitted.
Monogamous marriage is different from the modern concept mutual trust. Although marriage is officially or sacredly recognized only between one man and one woman, up to until the 19th century men had the freedom to engage in extramarital sexual relations with other women.
If children were born from these unions, which was quite often, they were considered illegitimate, and they had no right to inherit their father's property.
Women, unlike men, were punished for such free behavior, their reputation was threatened, and society harshly criticized them.
Church intervention
Western marriages were originally a kind of agreement between the families of two partners, without Catholic Church, nor the state had anything to do with marriage. In 1215 year, the church decided to intervene and issued a decree according to which those getting married must publicly announce marriage in order to reduce the number of illegal marriages.
Until the 16th century the church accepted just a couple's marriage vows, there was no need to have witnesses or confirm the marriage with official documents.
Marriage certificates
Over the past few hundred years, the state has begun to play a role in marriage important role. For example, in the United States, the state of Massachusetts began issuing marriage certificates in 1639, and by the 19th century such certificates had already become the norm.
Love-match
Love and affection were not an important part of marriage a hundred years ago. For example, during Victorian era in Europe, many men married women for whom they had no feelings no carnal desires, let alone feelings.
Gradually, throughout the world, unions that were organized by families, as well as arranged marriages, gave way to love marriage. By the way, the transition from an agricultural economy to a market economy played an important role in this, researchers say.
Parents have historically controlled the inheritance of agricultural land, finding good matches for your children. However, as the market economy began to spread, people stopped worrying so much about inheritance, and parental permission to marry became less important for children. Today, parents in almost all cases can provide the right to choose a marriage partner for one's children.
Modern Western culture allows women to play a significant economic role, have a career, earn money, which makes them more independent than ever before.
The spread of democratic freedoms and the right to choose also influences the fact that modern Western marriages are based on love. By the way, it is love, or rather its disappearance over time, that pushes people to divorce. New love allows you to enter into remarriages. Today, multiple marriages are not uncommon. Rather, it will be rare to have one marriage for life.
Miscellaneous rights
Just 50 years ago, marriage partners did not have equal rights. For example, in the USA right up to until 1970s Marital violence was not punished in any way in many states. Women could not get credit cards in their name and many other rights. They completely dependent on their spouses and, for example, did not have the opportunity to decide anything regarding the fate of common property.
Unions of equals
Total about 50 years ago Women and men began to officially have equal rights and responsibilities in marriage. Although the gender roles accepted in modern Western society are still may remain unchanged, more and more partners are advocating equal responsibilities in marriage.
For example, it is no longer uncommon for a man and a woman to do housework together, stand at the stove, take care of children, and at the same time both earn money.
Same-sex marriage
Legalization of same-sex love
Although there are still countries in the world where same-sex relationships are punishable by death (some countries in Africa and the Middle East), more and more countries legalize homosexual marriages. Since marriage today is based on mutual consent and freedom of choice, gay and lesbian weddings are a logical step. What does the future hold for the institution of marriage?
Happiness is in marriage
Myth: Because of the high divorce rate that ends unhappy marriages, people who stay married are happier than people of previous generations who were married and living with the person, regardless of how good the marriage was.
Fact: According to several large studies, the overall happiness of married people has not increased and has probably decreased slightly. Some studies have shown that marriages in the 21st century, compared with those 20 or 30 years ago, are characterized by greater work-related stress, more marital conflict, and less family contact and interaction.
Standard cohabitation
Myth: Cohabitation is the same as marriage, only without a stamp in the passport.
Fact: Cohabitation generally does not provide the same benefits (physical health, emotional and financial well-being) as marriage. In terms of these benefits, cohabitors are more similar to singles than married couples. This is because cohabitors are not as “perfect” as married couples, they are more focused on their personal autonomy and less on the well-being of their partner.
Sex life
Myth: Married people are less satisfied with their sex lives and have less sex than single people.
Fact: According to numerous large-scale studies, married people are much more likely to have sex, and they get more satisfaction from it than single people. Not only do they have sex more often, they enjoy it more, both physically and emotionally.
Violence in family
Myth: Marriage puts a woman at higher risk of violence.
Fact: Many studies show that, on the contrary, being unmarried and living with a man outside of marriage puts a woman at a higher risk of experiencing violence. One of the reasons for such findings may be that married women may hide the facts of domestic violence. In addition, women are less likely to marry and more likely to divorce someone who is violent. But it is also true that married men are less likely to commit domestic violence because they are more invested in the well-being of their wives, and therefore their families. These social factors, apparently, help a man’s aggressive behavior not to go beyond what is permitted.
Lifespan
Myth: People today should not expect a marriage to last a lifetime, as it did in the past, because life expectancy is much longer today.
Fact: If the comparison referred to in the myth has its roots in events a hundred years ago, then there is no reason to believe in the myth. The increase in life expectancy is explained by a sharp reduction in child mortality. And while an adult today lives somewhat longer than his grandparents, he also gets married at a later age. Therefore, the length of a typical marriage, without divorce, has not changed much over the past 50 years. In addition, many couples get divorced long before their marriage reaches a significant milestone: half of all divorces happen in the 7th year of marriage.
Life together before marriage
Myth: Couples who live shorter lives before marriage are able to test how well they are suited to each other, such marriages are more durable, and the partners receive more satisfaction from them.
Fact: Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have lower levels of marital satisfaction and are much more likely to end up in divorce. One reason is that cohabiters are more afraid of commitment and that they are more likely to leave when problems arise. In addition, the very fact of living together can lead to the development of a relationship that will “complicate” the possibility of a happy marriage. The results of one recent study showed, for example, that cohabitors are less motivated to resolve conflicts and maintain existing intimacy. One important exception: cohabiting couples who plan to marry soon have the same chance of marriage success as those who did not live together before marriage.
It is more difficult for an educated woman to get married
Myth: The more educated a woman is, the lower her chances of getting married.
Fact: A recent study based on an analysis of marriage rates among educated women in the 1990s concluded that today's college-educated women are more likely to marry than their uneducated counterparts, regardless of age. , in which the first marriage is created. This myth is a relic of the past, when women with a high level of education were actually less likely to get married.
Romance and strength of feelings
Myth: The key to a long and happy marriage is romantic love.
Fact: One of the most common reasons for the longevity of a marriage is due to interest in each other, partnership and companionship, rather than luck and love. These couples talk about their marriage as a creation that involves hard work, dedication, and commitment (to each other and to the institution of marriage). Happy spouses are friends who share a life and have the same interests and values.
Marriage strengthens with the birth of children
Myth: Having children usually brings spouses closer together and increases marital happiness.
Fact: Many studies have shown that the birth of the first child in a family often leads to the fact that husband and wife grow apart from each other. A child is a big test for a marriage. However, the number of divorces among childless couples exceeds the number of divorces among couples with children.
Benefits of marriage
Myth: Men benefit more from marriage than women.
Fact: Contrary to earlier research, women and men now see roughly the same benefits from marriage, although they manifest in different ways. Both men and women live happier, healthier, and wealthier lives when they are married. Husbands tend to reap more health benefits, while wives tend to reap more financial benefits.
: https://marya-iskysnica.livejournal.com
– The Oneida Colony, established in New York in 1848, advocated “compound” or group marriage, in which each woman was married to each man. They also practiced "scientific supervision", where the expectant parents were monitored by a committee of physical and mental health. - Traditionally, bridesmaids were expected to wear similar dresses to the bride to confuse the groom's rivals, evil spirits and robbers. - Wedding of spouses under 25 years of age significantly increases the risk of divorce. Also, the risk is higher when the woman is much older than the man, although this is not a very influential factor. - At an Italian wedding, glass or mirror breaking is a common occurrence. It is believed that the number of fragments will be equal to the number of happy years that the couple will live together. - The word “husband” (husband) comes from the Old Norse “husbondi” or “master of the house” (literally, hus, “house” + bondi = “master” home, resident") - Some scholars have traced the "fate" of the word "bride" (bride) to the Proto-Indo-European root "bru", which means "to cook, boil broth." - The term "groom" (groom) comes from The old English word is "guma", which means "person". - The level of education of people affects the age at which they marry. In states with higher numbers of college-educated adults, couples marry later. The opposite trend is observed in countries with low levels of education. - The probability that a first marriage will end in divorce within the first 5 years is 20%. In case of cohabitation, this indicator reaches 50%.
– The Code of Hammurabi (circa 1790 BC) includes ancient Babylonian scriptures and marriage laws. These early laws defined marriage as a contract that served to protect the female side while at the same time limiting her. Under the Code, a man had every right to divorce his wife if she was unable to bear children or she was a "tramp" who humiliated her husband in public and neglected her home. In addition, the wife must “drown herself” in the river or commit suicide if she cheated on her husband.
– People who lose their marriage during a serious illness live much shorter lives than those who are widowed, have a happy family, or have never been married at all.
– In Ancient Greece, Solon (638-538 BC) made marriage compulsory, and in Athens under Pericles (495-429 BC), bachelors were excluded from certain government positions unless they had a wife and children. In Sparta, single and childless people received contempt from society. In Ancient Rome (63 BC), laws were quickly passed that forced everyone to marry and punished those who remained single.
– The marriage ceremony usually ends with a kiss, because in ancient Rome a kiss had a legal connection with the completion of contracts, which meant entering into legal force.
– Stress associated with divorce affects the body’s immune system and its ability to resist disease.
– Throughout most of history, marriage was not necessarily based on mutual love. Sometimes couples came together to mutually acquire property or create a joint business. And even now such a situation is not uncommon.
– A white man from New Orleans in the late nineteenth century received a blood transfusion from the black woman he loved, thereby trying to overcome laws against discrimination. He claimed that he had also become just like her and could get married. How this story ended is unknown.
– Compared to single people, married people accumulate, on average, four times more wealth and assets. Those who are divorced have 77% less valuable assets than those who are single.
– Married older adults have a better chance of staying healthy if they exercise, stop smoking, eat healthy, and get regular medical checkups.
– About 60% of married adults have at least one job.
– The first written mention of same-sex marriage comes from Ancient Rome. While Christianity was being formed as an official religion, these ceremonies took place without much discussion. In 1989, Denmark became the first nation since Christianity to legally recognize same-sex marriage.
– Words make up only 7% of our communication with anyone, including between spouses. Tone of voice accounts for 38% and body language accounts for the remainder (55%) of a couple's relationship.
– More than 75% of people who get married for the first time eventually get divorced.
– Women who talk about a fair division of household labor tend to have happier marriages than women who are stressed by their husbands' lack of fulfillment of their household responsibilities.
– Researchers found a huge decline in satisfaction in personal relationships after 4 years of marriage, and a significant decline by seven to eight years. In fact, half of all divorces occur in the first seven years of marriage.
– Families are twice as likely to go to church.
– Married couples with children divorce much less often than childless ones.
– The number of cohabiting men and women aged 65 and over doubled between 1990 and 2000.
– 15 years of research have shown that an increased level of a person’s happiness before marriage is a guarantee of happiness in family life.
What doesn't happen in family life?! So people themselves create such situations that it’s hard to believe. And what don’t they come up with?! Judge for yourself!
Longest marriage
To live a long married life, it must begin early. For example, a certain Mr. Nariman and Mrs. Nariman were married at the age of five and lived together for 87 years (from 1853 to 1940). Lazarus Rowe and Molly Webber from the USA were officially married a year less (from 1743 to 1829). Mr. Rowe married at age 14. Manna Aliyeva has lived in the village of Vachi, Kulibsky district of Dagestan, for 132 years. Her husband is 130 years old and they have been married for 106 years.
Polygamist record
A 99-year-old grandfather died in the Lithuanian city of Mazeiki. The fact itself is ordinary, except for the venerable age of Felix’s grandfather and the legal incident that the deceased left behind. The fact is that in 1936 he married 17-year-old Philomena. They had five children, and in 1958, without divorcing, he married again. The marriage was registered in Riga with a certain A. Maksimova, and in 1977 in the Myazeikiai region he married for the third time - to K. Lyutkene, again preserving the first two families. After the death of the polygamist, all three families decided to lay claim to the inheritance, including a large house in Miažeika.
Highest number of remarriages
In the world of show business, there are known cases when the same people get married, divorced and remarried. Most often this is done for advertising, but repeating this maneuver more than 2-3 times is not recommended. But all of them are far from the couple from Seattle (USA). Jack V and Edna Moran married 40 times! Their first marriage was registered in 1937 in the USA. Then the celebrations took place, in particular, in 1952 - in Canada, in 1966 - in Egypt, in 1975 - in Great Britain...
But this is not a record either. Americans Ralph and Patsy Martin from Kaurtzite (Arizona) and another couple - Richard and Carol Roble from South Hempstead (New York) formalized their relationship 51 times!
Largest number of monogamous marriages
A true collector of marriages is the American Glyn Wolf. He has 27 wives. He first married as an 18-year-old boy in 1927, and the last time in 1970. He has, it seems to him, 41 children, 25 mothers-in-law, and he married two of his wives twice.
But the record for the number of marriages belongs to one lady who decided to remain incognito. She got married and divorced 73 times!
Harem of the King of Saudi Arabia
The harem of Saudi oil king Ahmed Amshari, who lives in the city of Riyadh, currently has 54 wives. Only four wives live permanently in his house; Islam no longer allows it. The rest are kept in villas he owns. Amshari bought most of his wives from their parents and brought them from Syria, Egypt, and Iraq. He likes the latter the most: “They agree to almost everything in bed.” His word can be trusted. After all, he was married 98 times!
Record-breaking scammer
But among those who were married to several women at the same time (this is called a bigamous marriage), the record is 104 marriages. That’s exactly how many times Giovanni Vigliotto, aka Fred Jipp, aka Nikolai Petrushkoy, etc., etc., married... This man used fifty names. During the years 1949-1981, he committed a lot of fraud - in 27 US states and in 14 other countries. Finally, in 1983, the “record holder” was convicted and sentenced to 28 years in prison for fraud, 6 years for polygamy and a fine of 300 thousand dollars. He died in 1991.
30 women met... in court
33-year-old American Pierce has been married to more than 30 women. And at the same time. He explained his long absences to each wife simply: the hard work of a traveling salesman. This whole smooth life collapsed one day when he forgot to meet one of his wives at the airport. She reported to the police that her husband was missing, and the FBI, having started a search, came across other women who declared themselves the legal spouses of Pierce... An annoying misunderstanding - well, just think, I forgot to meet my wife! - will now cost Pierce dearly: numerous lawsuits await him.
Neapolitan Don Giovanni
Neapolitan Giovanni Rovai, according to experts, is the holder of several absolute world records.
Firstly, he has 4,000 seduced women on his record. Handsome Rovai began his career at the age of 15, and although he is already 63 years old, he looks great and cares for five women at the same time.
Secondly, he never worked a day in his entire life. He believes that he was born to be a gigolo, and spends the money he receives from women to keep himself in great shape.
The groom is 91 years old
In 1999, 3,069 couples registered marriages at the Vinnitsa city registry office. Mendelssohn's solemn march sounded to them more than three thousand times. The young people rushed to register their marriage before the beginning of 2000, because, according to popular belief, it is impossible to get married in a leap year. Among the couples who decided to marry, the oldest groom was 91-year-old Vinnitsa resident N., his betrothed was 60.
The youngest groom was a 15-year-old gypsy boy who had to get married at all costs, because that was the circumstances of his bride. Unfortunately, in the same last year, 2895 divorces were registered. And here the reason is not only the difficult economic situation of young couples, but also a hasty, thoughtless approach to an important decision, which often determines the fate of newlyweds in life.
The oldest, the jealous one
A Macedonian from the city of Bitulya, Hristo Dmitrievsky, who was 101 years old, shot and killed his 73-year-old wife Stanka. The reason for the murder is jealousy. Hristo found his wife with her lover. The crime weapon was a hunting rifle, from which a single shot was fired.
100 year old newlyweds
The elderly groom, 103-year-old Harry Stevens, married 84-year-old Thelma Lucas. A “young” couple lived in one of the nursing homes in Wisconsin (USA, 1984). But in Cantley (Great Britain) in 1984, Winnifred Clarke (113 years old) married Albert Smith (80 years old), being the oldest bride in the world.
The couple switched genders
An amazing married couple Eric and Renata Shinega live in Austria (1990). The husband is a former woman, the wife is a former man. It’s interesting that Eric, being “her,” was very successful in alpine skiing, becoming an Olympic champion in his time.
Divided into cells
Newlyweds Karen and Justin from Ramsgate, England (1995) had an unforgettable wedding night. During the wedding feast, after heavy drinking, it became so noisy that the neighbors called the police. The police, without ceremony, took everyone present to the station. And the newlyweds spent their wedding night... in different prison cells.
Combined... on the screen
Technology today can do everything. She also brought variety to the boring process of marriage. A US resident, sitting in front of a video camera in New York, registered her marriage with her beloved, located on the other coast, in California (February 1995). And no violations: after all, according to American law, the judge must make sure that the bride and groom are in front of him, and he saw them perfectly well on the screen.
We bring to your attention an interesting selection of facts about marriage and marriage, and you will probably be surprised and discouraged by some of the statistics and research data below.
The term "marriage" comes from the Latin word Christmas and means "man" or "masculine". The earliest known use of the word is the thirteenth century.
The marriage ceremony usually ends with a kiss, as in ancient Rome, where a kiss had a legal connection to seal contracts, and marriage is considered a contract.
Traditionally, bridesmaids' dresses should be similar to the bride's dress to confuse the groom's rivals, evil spirits, and robbers.
Scientists have established the fact that the average person falls in love (censored) about seven times before he finally finds his soulmate, as they say, true love and marries her.
10,000 marriages a year begin with an affair that began during a coffee break.
What are the chances of living happily ever after with your first love? The facts say that they are very good. According to statistics, two out of five men marry their first lover.
85% of married couples had sex before marriage.
The average married couple makes love 58 times a year, or a little more than once a week.
After just two years of marriage, an estimated 20% of couples have sex less than 10 times a year.
Lack of sex in a marriage has a much more powerful, but negative, impact on a marriage than the positive impact of having good sex.
The most popular love ballad in the world, and the one most often chosen by newlyweds for their first dance at their wedding, is “Everything I Do” by Bryan Adams.
With work, children, television, the Internet, hobbies, and home with family responsibilities, the average married couple spends only four minutes a day on each other.
Although couples with children are less likely to divorce than childless couples, having a new child is likely to bring more stress and emotional distress than new happiness. About 90% of married couples experience a decrease in life satisfaction after the birth of their first child.
The birth order of people can influence whether a marriage will succeed or fail. The most successful marriages are those where the older sister or brother marries or marries the person who is the younger brother or sister in the family. Two firstborns tend to be more aggressive in a marriage and create a higher level of tension in the family. Divorce rates are highest when an only child in a family marries another only child in another family.
Doctors have established the fact that husbands who regularly kiss their wives before leaving for work live, on average, five years longer than those who run away in a hurry without saying goodbye to their beloved properly.
The likelihood of a first marriage ending in divorce within 5 years is 20%, but the likelihood of separation after premarital cohabitation within 5 years is 49%. After 10 years of first marriage, the likelihood of divorce is 33%, compared to 62% of separations after cohabitation.
Most young couples believe that happiness is “family”, “many children”, “a child’s smile”, “a good, strong and friendly family”. According to others, happiness is “not wasting energy on empty things, but directing it for the benefit of the common cause”, “quarreling less, and dreaming more in the fresh air”, “not losing faith in people.” Few people believe that the main thing in life is “love, mutual respect and love again”, “to love each other until the end of life”, “to carry tender feelings for each other throughout life”.
Compared to unmarried people, married people accumulate approximately four times more savings and assets. And those who are divorced have 77% lower assets than those who are not married.
Married couples tend to have thicker waists, which can lead to decreased sex drive and overall health. Additionally, a spouse's chances of gaining weight increase by 37% if his or her partner is fat.
Friendship, laughter, forgiveness, harmony, sex and trust are what spouses say are the crucial elements for a happy marriage.
Eighty-one percent of happily married couples say their spouse's friends and family rarely interfered in their relationship, compared with only 38% of unhappily married couples.
Researchers found a huge decline in happiness in the fourth year of marriage, with another decline occurring in the seventh to eighth year. In fact, half of all divorces occur in the first seven years of marriage, otherwise known as the “seven-year itch.”
Research points to certain characteristics that are most often associated with infidelity within a family. Such as: growing up in a family where the presence of intrigue is considered normal; where excitement and risk take precedence over family stability; friendships with colleagues and friends who believe that outside affairs are acceptable; and where there is emotional distance from one’s other half.
49 years is the critical age for entering into a first marriage.
The chances of divorce are reduced by 50% if the family has existed for 7 years.
50% of girls getting married for the first time are pregnant.
Married men often occupy higher positions at work, they are more willing to be promoted up the career ladder, and they are trusted more than unmarried employees.
Married women earn approximately 4-5% more than their unmarried counterparts.
Married men and married women live longer than bachelors and unmarried people.
