How to be independent. How to learn to be emotionally free from a man? I am well-groomed, well dressed, educated

Independence is a vital quality for people who want more control over their lives and feel like they don't need other people to achieve their goals. Independence will give you the freedom to do what you want and not care what others think, and you will be able to find solutions to your problems yourself. Plus, research shows that the more independent a person is, the happier they feel! This is because we feel relief and joy when we are able to take control of our lives. Want to know how to do this? Just follow these tips.

Steps

Think independently

Accept yourself. You cannot become a strong, independent person if you cannot get along with yourself. Accept your body, your personality, your views, your choices, your preferences and your life story. Don't say anything against yourself. Everyone can be strong enough. Everyone has to put up with something to prove their strength. Leave your mistakes in the past and learn from each one. Make an effort to be your best self and, most importantly, love yourself.

This is an important part of independence because by accepting yourself, you won't try to imitate someone else.

Believe in yourself. If you don't believe in yourself, then who else will believe in you? We are all different and each unique in our own way. No one can say your words, not everyone will agree with what you say, that's why it's very important that you stick to your guns because at the end of the day, you are all you have and if you believe in yourself, then that’s the only thing that really matters. Believing in yourself will allow you to rely on your own decisions, even if they are completely contrary to the expectations of other people or even society.
- If you don't believe in yourself, you will always doubt yourself and turn to others for help every time you need to make a decision. Avoid this.
Accept this world. Independent people are not vain and they do not believe that the entire human race is ruthless. Independent people are those who see the world with all its good and bad sides, and consciously decide to be strong for themselves and others. You cannot be called independent just because you do not trust anyone. You cannot be called independent just because you have a high opinion of yourself. Master this technique. Learn to accept this world, and decide to be strong.
- Accepting the world and all its complexities will also help you see that there are an infinite number of ways to live life - no one is forcing you to fit into one of them.
Be emotionally independent . You likely depend on many people to provide you with emotional support. This could be your parents, your boyfriend or your girlfriend, or your close friends. While you may continue to depend on these people for the rest of your life, it is in your best interest to realize that any person you depend on may one day no longer be around. Some of them will leave, some will become distant, and all of them will eventually die. The only person who will always be there for you is yourself. If you turn to yourself for support, you will never be denied.
- It's normal to become attached to the few main people in your life, but you shouldn't let your happiness depend on them. It depends only on you.
Motivate yourself correctly . Other people do not, and never will, have the same stake in your success. Motivation and success are a matter of habit. You must give up your bad habit of procrastinating from day to day, replacing it with the habit of good planning. The most successful people in the world are not always the brightest or the most beautiful, but no matter what other talents and gifts they are blessed with, they bolster their self-esteem with a series of victories over challenges big and small. This is how you learn everything in school, gain confidence in romantic relationships and in general in everything in life.
- If you want to achieve a career goal, then it should satisfy you, not your family. This also applies to excellent grades in school.
- Don't try to lose weight, publish a book, or build a house just to impress others. Do this only to set yourself up for success.
Be your own hero. A role model can inspire you and show you how to live. Finding someone you deeply admire and who shares your values is not a bad thing at all. However, at the end of the day, it is important to think of yourself as your own idol, as a person who is capable of saying and doing whatever he wants. Strive to be yourself, and be your best self. If you can't respect yourself, you can't be independent.
- Do not turn any of your friends or acquaintances into your idol. This will only increase the likelihood that you will forget what you like.
Accept the fact that life is not always fair. Our parents cared so much about us that they did everything in their power to raise us in a fair and proper environment. The real world doesn't always work this way, and that's a big problem today. Rules in the world usually protect either the majority (of which you may not be a part) or the people with money and power. You may be treated poorly for a variety of unfair reasons: your gender, your skin color, your intelligence, your height, your weight, your beliefs, the amount of money you have, and other aspects that make up your personality. You should be happy despite this.
- Don't let the injustices of the world stop you from doing what you want to do. Do you want to be a nurse? A woman in the army? Be the first person in your family to receive a higher education? Strive for this instead of convincing yourself that it is impossible in the modern world.
Stop worrying about what other people think. This is the most important thing about independence. If you depend on what others say about your outfit, about your music, then you will not be happy! If you like it, then nothing else matters! Stop worrying about other people's judgments about your life, your clothes, your career, or your significant other. These are your decisions and yours alone.
- If there is a constant nagging thought in your head, “What will people think if...”, then you will always hold yourself back and will not be able to do what you like.
Just don't need it think that you are the best, prove it to yourself! Your own opinion is very important for your motivation. It's much easier to just commit to your responsibilities and know with an incredibly strong rationale that you can handle whatever comes your way because you've already done it, rather than trying to convince yourself that you can take it on because that's who you are. warm and fuzzy inside. The warm and fuzzy achieve very little, as do those who constantly exhaust themselves.

Get your own information. Watch and read the news and be sure to get it from different sources. Follow the news as often as possible, and always try to listen to both sides before forming your opinion. You can also talk to people from different professions to get more information on a relevant topic, but never let other people tell you what to think. Try to read as much as possible, be it literature or newspapers. If you are well informed, you will not be led and you will have your own independent opinion.

Act more independently

Maintain strong friendships. You don't have to reject your friends to be independent. In fact, good friends strengthen your independence. When your friend needs someone to talk to, be there. Be reliable. Don't gossip about your friends or tell anyone about their secrets or personal affairs. Even if they didn't ask for it. Be a strong person for your friends and loved ones. Not only does this show your selflessness, but very soon you will know how to handle any situation that comes your way thanks to the experiences of your friends.

Become financially independent. This will be difficult because parents have a natural instinct to provide for us. Just politely decline when they offer financial help. Of course, it is tempting to receive financial help from others, but to experience independence, you must become independent. Provide yourself financially. Truly independent living relies on financial freedom. Pay your own bills, drive your own car, pay your own rent.

If you don't have money for these expenses, be frugal. Not only will you gain financial freedom through your savings, the money you save will also give you an incredible sense of independence and motivation.

Don't give up. Not with anything. Not for the sake of comfort, not for the sake of relief, not for the sake of good manners. Always be diligent in whatever you do. Defend your beliefs. Separately for you, girls: do not let a man think that he should pamper you. If you can do something well, do it. If it doesn't have any negative effect, you should do it. This doesn't mean that you have to do absolutely everything yourself, but you shouldn't feel the need for someone else to do for you what you can do yourself.
- Do everything to the best of your ability and always try to have people say about you: “This person doesn’t expect anyone to do anything for him. What a strong, independent person.”
Leave friends and family at home when you can. This is a difficult step towards independent living, but you must remain alone with yourself. You don't have to go to a restaurant with someone because you can meet them there. Go shopping alone, spend at least one or two evenings a week alone. Do things that force you to lead rather than be led.
- If you're used to having a friend with you when you go for a walk or to the mall, try what it's like to do it alone.
Get away from bad influences. Don't break friendships unless absolutely necessary. Learn to maintain a healthy distance. Even if these friends are “so cool,” they will only hold you back from breaking through on your own. “Water your garden” - some people energize you, while others stunt your growth and drain all your energy. If you have a friend who is trying to force you to do things that make you feel uncomfortable, whether it's stealing or simply being inappropriate, then it's time to end the relationship.
- Avoid people who really only want followers and like to be idolized. These people just want you to do what they tell you and they will not let you become independent.
Save money. Save as much as is realistically possible. This will help you create an emergency fund for yourself as life can be unpredictable at times. You can't plan for unforeseen circumstances. Improve your quality of life by saving a certain amount of money every month. There are things like accidents, health problems or even natural disasters that can appear when you least expect it.
- You may think that you have no way to save money, but even something as small as making homemade coffee instead of going to the coffee shop every day can help you save a decent amount over the course of a year!
Open a bank account. Most banks offer one checking and savings account in one package. Some companies, institutions and organizations will require you to at least have a checking account (some only pay employees through direct deposit). The money you earn that is not needed for current expenses should be put into a savings account until you are ready to become independent.
- If you have your own bank account, you will not be dependent on others financially and this will also help you avoid reckless spending.
Start your career path. Experiment with different careers and find the one you like best. If money makes you happy, become an investment banker or start a small business. If you love children, become a teacher. If you like being an expert, become a lawyer, professor, or consultant. If you love talking to people, become a salesperson or a service worker. If you'd rather know how things work, become an engineer, psychologist or sociologist.
- Most students end up working outside of their field of study. Some people do not pursue formal higher education and end up becoming millionaires. Working in an environment you enjoy is part of becoming an adult.
Find your passion . It's what you're committed to, whether it's sports, a girl or a guy, music, art, religion. What you do constantly, what takes up your time: the main thing is to feel the line between healthy passion and painful obsession. Video games and playing Barbie all day long are not the best option; This also includes time wasted on the Internet. (However, if you create your own websites or a collection of clothes for the same Barbie, this is a different matter!)
- Finding your passion will make your life more meaningful and you will feel like you know what you really want out of life.
Plan your day according to what you need to you. People who are most dependent on others allow their world to revolve around other people's needs or other aspects. Plan your day according to your own schedule. Make a list of what you want to do, what you need to do, and what you should have already done. If a friend really needs help, fine, but don't let that friend's business take precedence over the plan you've so carefully crafted.
- Treat your personal time like it's a date with Brad Pitt. This means guarding it carefully and not letting anyone interfere with your alone time.
Thank people for their help. You don't have to be stubborn to be independent. If someone really helped you, then thank that person by giving them a sincere “thank you,” sending them a card, or giving them a hug if they are a close friend. There's nothing wrong with admitting that sometimes you really need help, it won't make you any less independent.

Avoid trends. Just because someone is willing to pay $60 for a T-shirt doesn't mean you should do the same. Dress the way you want to dress and say what you want to say. If you like to act crazy, do it! It is important to remember that good taste and style cannot be bought with money: it is an innate or acquired quality that helps with the help of skills to make something good out of anything.

Spend time with people with different worldviews. Spending time with people who are exactly like you will do nothing to inspire you to be a more independent person. Making an effort to make friends with people from different backgrounds and backgrounds will help you understand the world better and see that there is no one right way.
- Talking to an attorney if you're a yoga instructor or spending time with a chef if you're a student can refresh your mind. This can make you more open and willing to try something completely new yourself.

Live more independently

Learn to drive a car or travel by public transport. You will never be completely independent until you learn to drive or get around on your own. How can you call yourself independent if you always need your boyfriend, friend or parents to give you a ride? This of course assumes you are old enough to drive. If you live in the suburbs and need a car to get anywhere, then grab the bull by the horns and get a driver's license, then work on getting your own car.
- If you live in a big city, don't wait for good weather to get to your destination on foot, and don't wait for a friend to give you a lift - check the subway, bus or train schedules.
- If you depend on other people for transportation, it is more likely that you will often stay home or wait for another person to determine your destiny. You should be able to do what you want, when you want.
Do your own research instead of constantly asking others for help. Maybe you always call your dad to help you with your finances, or you call your mom every five minutes when planning a big party or wedding. Perhaps you have a friend who is an expert in all areas, and you always turn to this person when you encounter problems at work, when you have trouble with your car, or when you are trying to adjust the TV. If you want to be more independent, learn to do your own research first before calling such people.
- It's great if you have people you can turn to, but the next time you pick up the phone, ask yourself, “Can I find out this information on my own?” The answer in most cases will be yes. Of course it will take you more time, but think how much more rewarding it will be.
Learn to cope around the house. Are you tired of calling a plumber, repairman, painter, or just a close friend every time something goes wrong in your home? Learn how to do household chores by watching helpful videos, reading WikiHow or magazines. If you have a good friend who is a carpenter, ask him for carpentry lessons. If you learn how to organize things in your home, you will save a lot of money and not have to wait for someone to come and fix everything.
- And by the way, learning how to unclog a clogged toilet yourself is much better than waiting for someone else to get to it.
Cook it yourself. Don't be dependent on food delivery to your home or the restaurant across the street. You don't have to be a master chef to learn the basics of cooking: how to fry basic foods, how to use the oven, and how to prepare simple dishes like pasta, potatoes, and salads. Knowing that you can go to the supermarket or market, grab a few key ingredients and cook a delicious dinner will help you feel like you can do anything on your own.
- If you become a good cook, you can even invite guests to enjoy the benefits of your skills.
Get used to doing everything yourself. If you are truly independent, then you will not need a friend nearby to handle every small task or to engage in any interesting activity. Don't wait for a friend to go to that new restaurant or see that new movie at the theater. Treat yourself and do it alone - if you go to the movies, you'll be surprised how many other people also enjoy a good movie by themselves.
- It all depends on the attitude. If you feel comfortable doing it all alone, then no one will judge you.
Take your time. Rome was not built in a day, and no one can be completely independent. This is not a hard-and-fast guide that you should adhere to. If you don't want to do something, don't do it. This is posted here to tell you how to be independent if you want to be, and in no way is it to say, “Be independent and only independent. Don't get close to anyone. Follow this as strictly as you would a manual on how to become a billionaire.” Enjoy the journey to independence.

A man pays little attention, and you suffer from this, you always agree with the man’s opinion, even when you internally disagree with his position, or the most extreme option is that the man cheats, and you suffer, continuing to love him, not knowing how to cope with your emotional dependence .

Why is it most often a woman who becomes emotionally dependent on a man, and not vice versa?

The answer lies in our psychology, strengthened by upbringing. From early childhood, girls are taught that the most important things in life are love, family, and children. Exactly in this sequence. Some are offered a successful marriage instead of love, again to create a good family, the well-being of children and possibly personal comfort.

And that's why while we dream of love...

Young men are offered a different scale of values

Their personal achievements always come first, be it a career, sports, or any skills in which a future man must succeed in order to feel happy and be able to provide for his family. Are boys told that to be happy they need to fall in love? Or: “Will you be successful and happy if you create a good family?”

Rather, they will tell him “You will be successful and happy if you achieve this, that and that, and you can ensure the well-being of your family.” In second place in the scale of values, a man has their pleasures. You can’t throw all your energy into achieving your goals; you also need to be able to relax. Hunting, fishing, football, computer games or other male pleasures.

Family life, children, love are the prerogative of women. Of course, men also need love, warm family relationships, and communication with children. But these values, as a rule, fade into the background in the minds of men.

Before marriage, a girl’s range of interests can be varied: friends, clubs, sports clubs, etc. Often, part of these interests is again aimed at achieving the girl’s main mission - to get married! And after the main goal has been achieved, most of us set other equally worthy goals - creating comfort in the home and raising children, completely devoting ourselves both physically and emotionally to the implementation of these missions.

After starting a family, women often give up their purely personal pleasures, communication with friends, trying to devote themselves as much as possible to their beloved husband and children. More often than not, family responsibilities turn into needs.

At this time, a man puts his efforts into work and his emotions into pleasure. After all, everything is in order in the family, everything is under the close control of the woman.

Therefore, while we are suffering from a lack of attention from a man, he is thinking about how to conquer the next peak in his career, achieve results in his hobby, or dreams of an adventure with a new woman.

And here we fall into the trap of our own illusions, becoming emotionally dependent on men. This dependence is especially pronounced among women who decide to become housewives. They express themselves when they see the result of their labors. A clean house, a delicious lunch on the table, smart and well-mannered children. And a natural need arises for this result to be appreciated by the man he loves. And the husband most often does not consider this an achievement, but a fact for granted.

How to avoid this?

How to learn to be emotionally free from a man?

The answer, as we see, lies on the surface. You don’t need to direct all your emotions in one direction! Redistribute them. Of course, we will not be able to completely change our feminine essence. The need to take care of children, husband, home will not go away and that’s good!

But if you want to become emotionally free from a man, you must understand what brings you pleasure besides caring for your children and husband. Direct a significant part of your emotions in this pleasant and fruitful direction. Do not sacrifice communication with friends who are really interesting to you for the sake of a family hearth, because your man allows himself purely male meetings. Set a goal to increase your self-esteem!

Find yourself a hobby that will bring you real joy! Getting bright positive feelings is the best key to emotional freedom. This could be a sports section, dancing, or a hobby club. If your hobbies include interesting people who are not related to your family, this is only for the better! Your horizons will expand and there will always be topics to discuss with your husband.

The more positive emotions you receive, outside your man’s zone of influence, the more valuable those you give him will be, and the more often he will have the desire to reciprocate your feelings.

Any, even the most insignificant movement forward is more effective than stupid waiting. They don't call after the interview? Call yourself and find out when a decision will be made. Boyfriend can't decide on plans for the weekend? Plan your leisure time independently of it. Can't get a promotion for a long time? Consider other companies or related vacancies. It is better to try many options and not get what you want than to do nothing at all. No one will do more for you than yourself.

Don't think about how they evaluate you. Evaluate it yourself

There is little pleasure in sitting on a date in a cafe and wondering: “How do I like him?” You've probably noticed that men often don't even consider the possibility that they might not like you. So relax, sit back and evaluate your boyfriend in all respects. At the same time, you will decide whether he is interesting to you or not.

Don't wishful thinking

Imagine how much time you can save if you don't waste it on interpreting signals of male sympathy. What difference does it make how he looked and whether he put his thumb in the belt of his trousers if he still hasn’t called and offered to meet? An axiom tested by generations of women says: a man doesn’t call for two reasons - either he doesn’t want to, or he’s dead. The best attitude is calm optimism and the absence of mood swings due to someone's calls or lack thereof.

Know how to cheer yourself up

Don’t let yourself get discouraged because your boss scolded you for being late, an elderly lady was rude in public transport, or your friend criticized your new haircut. Other people should not negatively influence your emotional state and undermine your self-esteem. To stay in good shape, keep in mind a solid list of things that you enjoy: a warm bath with a book, a cup of coffee with syrup, going to the pool or going for a pedicure. Compensate for failure with pleasure.

Popular

Don't get over yourself

Self-love is the first step in any relationship in your life. Don't expect others to love you more than you love yourself. The most valuable relationship in a person's life is the relationship with himself. What matters is what you think about yourself. You can’t feel emotionally comfortable in the morning if the night before you sat in the office late doing someone else’s work. When you don’t want to do something, politely refuse, and you will feel what “a weight off your shoulders” and “lightness in your soul” means.

Don't compare yourself to others

Comparing your successes with the successes of others often leads to envy. If you are unhappy that Lenka from the marketing department has received a promotion, but you, a procurement specialist, have not yet, think about what does not suit you in your situation. Do you not feel valued, are you working outside of your calling, or do you firmly believe that high status guarantees moral satisfaction? Comparing yourself with Lenka is the same as comparing south with north, and day with night.

Develop your abilities

Harmonious personal and professional development can make you happier and have a positive impact on your self-esteem. Regularly do what you are good at and what you really enjoy. Learn to do it really well. And sometimes it’s useful to trust some technique for identifying innate tendencies. You may not develop them, but you will certainly take note of them. What you don't do in your daily work can be turned into a hobby. Developing talent cultivates qualities that can be valuable in both your career and personal life.

Develop missing skills

You probably know the feeling of reluctance to take on a task that requires the use of tools that you do not know well. For example, you don’t like working in Excel and always procrastinate when preparing a report in this program. Ask a colleague to show you a few functions, and you'll finish reporting faster next month.

Here's what Brian Tracy, author of books on self-development and leadership, writes about the missing skills: “You can learn masterful time management just like you can learn anything, and here's a big clue: you may be missing just one time management skill to double your income. You may be missing just one business skill! You probably already know what this skill is...”

Forgive yourself for your weaknesses

Weaknesses are like curls in fingerprints; without them, it would be impossible to identify who the fingers belong to. Weaknesses make us not only imperfect, but also human, because they teach us to accept the weaknesses of others. Forgive yourself not laziness or bad habits, but some addictions and distinctive features: love of coffee, clutter on the table, slowness or excessive talkativeness. Although such little things take you away from the ideal, they work great for your corporate style.

Be financially independent

Material independence gives you an advantage in everything. Girls who are able to take care of themselves are respected more, and you yourself feel much more confident having a stable income. You can be a real master of your life only if you don’t ask for anything from anyone and don’t expect anything from anyone. An independent girl can afford expenses that some would consider unreasonable: spa treatments, shoes to lift her spirits, lunch at a restaurant, lots of swimsuits or taxi services. It is also advisable to increase your own emergency reserve by putting aside 5-10% of your salary every month. If the funds stop coming, you will not be lost.

Be free from prejudice

Some people initially accept for themselves the rules of life that the majority live by. In everything you need to listen to the advice of your parents, always give up your seat in transport, work only in your specialty, after two years of relationship you must get married, preferably before the age of 25 and have at least two children. Such attitudes are only suitable for you if you accept them for yourself. To curious neighbors eager to know when you will finally get married, it is better to answer politely but firmly: “As soon as I have such a desire, I will immediately inform you about it.”

Marina Lysenko and Anzhelika Zakharina strived for emotional independence

Everyone is capable of becoming a successful and financially independent person. The only question is how to do it quickly and accurately.

There are universal rules, on the regular observance of which a person’s future depends. Their effectiveness can be easily verified by reading the biography of any successful figure: from a writer to a participant in the foreign exchange market.

However, in order not to waste time, let's start studying them. So, how to become a financially independent and successful person?

Rule #1: Continuously learn

At one of the seminars, Australian billionaire Peter Daniels was asked about the most profitable way to invest $100,000. The answer turned out to be perfect. The tycoon advised investing all funds in education, since it is the most important asset of any successful and financially secure person.

An ardent supporter of this rule is the famous business coach Brian Tracy, who advises everyone to become an “eternal student” and daily replenish their piggy bank with useful knowledge (he considered seminars, reading and audio books to be the most important sources of information).

It is impossible to list all the followers of this rule, but the above examples are enough to understand the price of continuous learning.

Rule No. 2. Look for something you like

If a person enjoys what he does, then he will practically not feel tired, he will have no time to worry, be distracted and do extraneous things. And if we add financial interest to such productivity, then we can assume that happiness has been found in life.

Two main questions remain to be answered:

how to find something like this?
how to make it permanent?

It's simple. Imagine what kind of things you could do indefinitely and for free. Rank the answers. Select main. Set a goal to reach the pinnacle of mastery in this matter. Now all that remains is to find a way to put the chosen activity to optimal use.

This is where your creativity should be activated. There is another option: study the biographies of successful people in your chosen field and simply copy their path.

Rule No. 3. Give up mental blocks

All obstacles exist only in the head. Once they are destroyed, impossible things become achievable. A successful person has a mindset of inevitable success. This allows him to ignore failures and treat them as temporary phenomena. Force yourself to think this way.

Rule No. 4. Work according to the Messi formula

Recently, a video appeared on the Internet with football star Lionel Messi, who in one and a half minutes talks about the secret of his success: “get up early, work hard, do it day after day, year after year...”. Here we can only add the Pareto principle, according to which important tasks provide most of the results (80% of success depends on 20% of targeted efforts).

Rule No. 5. Learn financial literacy

Fabulous capital passes through the hands of even the most unclaimed worker during his lifetime. The problem is that many people don't even realize this fact. It’s easier for people to blame their hated job and bosses, who bring in a pittance of income. But it’s easy to destroy such a myth.

Just read a few Robert Allens and millionaire status will seem not so far away.

Rule No. 6. Master time management

Time is a free resource, by managing which you can achieve heights in any business. Ever since school, everyone is familiar with the statement that each person has only 24 hours a day to realize his potential. So why do some become famous and rich, while others live out their days in a miserable hut? It's all about the art of planning. Master it and be amazed how your productivity increases every day.

Rule No. 7. Progress and “comfort zone” are incompatible concepts

Everything is simple here. Until a person learns to ignore his fears and worries, while he polishes the plan for his triumph, success will become increasingly distant.

We need to act now. It may be uncomfortable and scary, but there is no other way.

Study the biography of any major businessmen. It is almost impossible to meet among them the lucky one who conquered the top of the investment world the first time. So why are you worse?

Rule #8: Practice Quality Relationships

Progress is stimulated by like-minded people. This is an axiom of success, stated in all bestsellers devoted to personal development. Get them started.

Strong people try to ignore “mentally petty” individuals who are incapable of anything other than negativity and toxic emotions.

Rule #9: Become a Disciplined Titan

One of the key economic laws of capital accumulation is to invest money continuously. The same can be said about personal growth, career, family relationships and any other area. If you take a step towards your goal every day, its achievement will become inevitable. The trick is that fate rewards targeted people with a bonus in the form of experience that can greatly accelerate the speed on the path to their dreams.

And finally, I would like to say about the unspoken secret of all wealthy people, which comes from the heart. Help those in need - this is its essence. If a person begins to give something, then this something begins to increase in him. It is difficult to explain this phenomenon; you just need to believe in it.

Good luck and see you in the next article.

Don't wait - act!

Don't think about how they evaluate you. Evaluate it yourself

There is little pleasure in sitting on a date in a cafe and wondering, “How do I like him?” You've probably noticed that men often don't even consider the possibility that they might not like you. So relax, sit back and evaluate your boyfriend in all respects. At the same time, you will decide whether he is interesting to you or not.

Don't wishful thinking

Imagine how much time you can save if you don't waste it on interpreting signals of male sympathy. What difference does it make how he looked and whether he put his thumb in the belt of his trousers if he still hasn’t called and offered to meet? An axiom tested by generations of women says: a man doesn’t call for two reasons: either he doesn’t want to, or he’s dead. The best attitude is calm optimism and the absence of mood swings due to someone's calls or lack thereof.

Know how to cheer yourself up

How to become successful and independent? Don’t let yourself get discouraged because your boss scolded you for being late, an elderly lady was rude in public transport, or your friend criticized your new haircut. Other people should not negatively influence your emotional state and undermine your self-esteem. To stay in good shape, keep in mind a solid list of things that you enjoy: a warm bath with a book, a cup of coffee with syrup, going to the pool or going for a pedicure. Compensate for failure with pleasure.

Popular

Don't get over yourself

Don't compare yourself to others

Comparing your successes with the successes of others often leads to envy. How to become an independent girl? If you are unhappy that Lenka from the marketing department has received a promotion, but you, a procurement specialist, have not yet, think about what does not suit you in your situation. Do you not feel valued, are you working outside of your calling, or do you firmly believe that high status guarantees moral satisfaction? Comparing yourself with Lenka is the same as comparing south with north, and day with night.

Develop your abilities

Develop missing skills

Forgive yourself for your weaknesses

Be financially independent

Material independence gives you an advantage in everything. Girls who are able to take care of themselves are respected more, and you yourself feel much more confident having a stable income. You can be a real master of your life only if you don’t ask for anything from anyone and don’t expect anything from anyone. An independent girl can afford expenses that some would consider unreasonable: spa treatments, shoes to lift her spirits, lunch at a restaurant, lots of swimsuits or taxi services. And also, in order to become an independent woman, it is advisable to increase your own emergency reserve, putting aside 5-10% of your salary every month. If the funds stop coming, you will not be lost.

Be free from prejudice

Some people initially accept for themselves the rules of life that the majority live by. In everything you need to listen to the advice of your parents, always give up your seat in transport, work only in your specialty, after two years of relationship you must get married, preferably before the age of 25, and there must be at least two children. Such attitudes are only suitable for you if you accept them for yourself. To curious neighbors eager to know when you will finally get married, it is better to answer politely but firmly: “As soon as I have such a desire, I will immediately inform you about it.”

Text: Marina Lysenko and Anzhelika Zakharina