The child does not want to put away his toys. How to teach a child to collect toys - when they might get offended and leave? The child does not want to collect toys, what to do?

Independence manifests itself in different ways: in the ability to make independent decisions (from developmental sports and artistic activities), to behave according to the situation (with children and adults, with acquaintances and strangers), to take care of oneself and one’s property. This includes cleaning up your toys before going to bed. Teaching a child this, much less making him do it, is extremely difficult work. Still, it's worth a try!

Top 3: how to teach a child to put away toys

1. . As in all personal manifestations (relationships with loved ones, and self-development, interests, hobbies and daily habits), in cleaning up things after yourself child depends on parents. If mom, having prepared dinner, immediately washes the dishes and puts away the remaining food in its place, at the end of the meal she washes the dishes without being distracted by TV shows and, and dad, returning from fishing, immediately lays out his fishing rods and tackle, and hangs his clothes in the closet, not throws them on the floor and sofas, then the question: “how to get a child to put away toys” simply will not arise. From the first months, the baby sees how his parents behave in everyday life and learns the norms of their behavior.(and not “correct” theories - words spoken during “soul-saving” conversations). Clean up after yourself, help your child tidy up the nursery - and the problem will be solved!
2. « Bribe" We do not at all mean all kinds of blackmail - from emotional to material (“You won’t go to the cinema”, “You won’t get pocket money”, “We won’t buy a new one”...)! In the educational aspect, we can talk about certain promises that are important for the child and related to interpersonal relationships with mom and dad (the latter is especially important in connection with the total relationship with the younger generation). For example, in the evening, shortly before bed, you can ask your child to clean up the nursery, offering him his favorite book afterwards, tell him a fairy tale, or watch a filmstrip together. But it’s not worth threatening deprivations (the same or sweets after dinner) - it’s unpedagogical and humanly cruel;
3. "Competition" or "game". If the baby has not reached yet, he is easily drawn into any active activity, regardless of its benefits. The main thing is to have fun! How to teach a child to put away toys? Organize the Olympic Games: who will collect all the cars into a box faster, who will fold the pyramid quickly and without mistakes, who will put the books on the shelf without denting or tearing, etc. Kids instantly join in the “competitions” proposed by their parents, there is not even a need to promise them a reward and prizes. Mom’s sincere participation, dad’s lack of a dissatisfied look distracted from “mega-important” matters is the best reward for a child! For which you can not only clean the nursery, but also do your homework with pleasure and not say bad words and generally be a good girl!

Recently, educational toys have appeared on the shelves of all stores. “What would it be like without them?!” - the teachers exclaim. Let's figure out what an educational toy is.

As the name suggests, this is a toy that develops something in a child: fine motor skills or some kind of knowledge. By and large, all toys are educational: a rattle teaches a child to control his hands (grab, move from hand to hand, throw). And yet, developmental toys are usually those that allow a child to learn something in a playful way. You can make many of these toys with your own hands.

The main stages of child development

Before you start making a toy, determine what age it will be designed for. Obviously, it will not be of interest to a five-year-old. It is also important what the child is interested in. It depends on what shape your toy will be and what plot it will be combined with.

I would like to remind you that everything is individual. Perhaps your child has already mastered some skill ahead of time, perhaps not.

0- 3 months

The child lies on his back most of the time. It is necessary to develop the ability to focus your gaze.

Types of toys: mobiles, bright rattles, garlands, beads.

Requirements for toys: different textures, lightness of toys, simple shapes. The colors are bright, but not variegated. Preferably no more than 5 items.

3 - 6 months

The child moves more and puts all objects in his mouth. Learns to roll over from back to stomach. It is necessary to develop coordination of movements, hearing and vision, and grasping skills.

Types of toys: tumblers, rag beads, toys with a mirror, rattles - dumbbells, rings. Educational mats with arcs. Rag balls, button bracelets.

Requirements for toys: bright, different-textured toys that make different sounds.

6 - 9 months

The child learns to crawl and recognizes loved ones. For some time he is able to entertain himself. It is necessary to encourage motor and speech activity, as well as develop the ability to grasp an object not with the whole hand, but with two fingers.

Types of toys: educational mats, sorters, pyramids, nesting dolls, musical toys with buttons.

Requirements for toys: bright, sounding toys should differ in shape, weight, and method of use.

9 - 12 months

The child learns to walk and talk. It is necessary to develop motor and speech activity.

Types of toys: educational rugs and picture books, rolling toys, dolls with pronounced facial features, glove and finger puppets, pyramids, cubes, sorters, variants of boxes, buckets, baskets (insert toys).

Requirements for toys: toys consisting of different parts that can be assembled and disassembled. Toys that reflect real world situations.

1 year - 1 year 3 months

Active development and exploration of the surrounding world begins. The child shows a desire for independence. It is necessary to develop motor and speech activity, as well as thinking operations: comparison, generalization, analysis.

Types of toys: pyramids, cubes, insert toys, musical instruments.

Requirements for toys: toys consisting of different parts that can be assembled and disassembled.

1 year 3 months - 1 year 6 months

Development of speech, encouragement of speech activity, development of fine motor skills (unfastening - fastening in various ways). Development of the operation of thinking.

Types of toys: educational mats and books, cubes, toys with a surprise (secret), sorters.

Requirements for toys: toys that allow you to generalize objects based on similarity, size, color. Names of animals, plants, clothes, etc.

1 year 6 months - 1 year 9 months

Active knowledge of the surrounding world. It is necessary to develop the active use of objects for other purposes, independent play, and understanding of emotions.

Types of toys: toys that reflect real situations and objects of the surrounding world, animals.

Requirements for toys: subject games (story, construction, etc.). Toys that require you to show and name colors, shapes, and choose an action.

1 year 9 months - 2 years

The child is undergoing active social development. It is necessary to develop an understanding of shape, color, size.

Types of toys: sorters, pyramids, cubes, books.

Requirements for toys: toys that can be grouped by shape, color, size.

2 - 3 years

The baby’s active social development continues; he already knows how to interact with other children. It is necessary to develop fine motor skills, as well as the ability to distinguish shapes, colors, and sizes.

All types of toys. Crafts made from natural materials, paper, plasticine.

Requirements for toys: toys for subject, role-playing games.

35 years

Activity, the ability to independently organize your play activities. These skills need to be strengthened.

Types of toys: children's lotto, puzzles. Games for learning the time of day and seasons. Learning the alphabet and numbers.

Materials for making educational toys

There are a huge variety of materials for making educational toys, most of them are found in every home!

Remnants of fabric

Educational toys are good because you can use leftovers that every needlewoman has for them. For example, the remains of various fabrics, felt, fleece, knitwear. Different textures are welcome!

Want to make your life easier? Use small pieces of fabric that are applied to new suits.

Those who know how to knit can use squares that are knitted to calculate the stitches.

Everything is used: laces, ribbons, buttons, beads, zippers, buttons, drawstrings, latches, adhesive tape, buckles and much, much more! And small thermal applications may well play the role of a secret hidden behind a curtain or in a pocket.

Furniture fittings

Latch latches, hooks, keys with locks and threaded screws can be used, for example, when “building” a house.

Rustling elements

The rustling of one or another element is achieved by placing a crumpled cellophane wrapper from tea or a box of chocolates inside.

Rattle elements

The rattling elements provide a huge scope for imagination. Place inside a plastic container from shoe covers or a plastic egg from Kinder Surprise, into which some cereal (rice, peas, buckwheat, small pasta), salt, dry cherry pits or acorns are poured.

Ringing elements

Most often they are a small bell, bought for little money in a souvenir shop or fishing store.

Shiny and transparent elements

These include pieces of thick foil, the inside of juice or milk packaging, as well as packaging from toys or bedding.

Opening elements

Children usually really like them, especially if someone is hiding under them) Options: window, pockets, curtains. Or you can use these regular water or juice caps.

Old clothes

Some craftswomen use children's clothes for their babies, which are already too small for them.

Fillers

Synthetic padding polyester, foam rubber (then your cube will keep its shape) or polystyrene foam are usually used as soft fillers.

However, I am sure that if you think about it, you will definitely come up with something of your own!

What types of educational toys are there?

On the Internet you can find a huge number of educational toys made by yourself: books, cubes, panels and rugs, pillows, stands, houses, animal figures, etc.

Developmental mat

The plots are also varied. It could be some kind of children's fairy tale or just a picture with a plot.

Remember, for example, what your boy is interested in: cars or trains?

Variants of books “about a baby” are interesting - they not only develop motor skills, but also help the child to better know the world around him.

Or maybe it will just be a cube with some elements? The choice is yours.

All toys can be divided into 2 large groups: those with whom the child can play independently and those for whom need help or presence of an adult. Typically, the first category includes entertaining toys for children in the first months of life, as well as toys that develop fine motor skills. After several demonstrations, the child will be able to independently unfasten a zipper or button, unscrew the lid, etc.

The presence of an adult requires toys that develop the ability to count; find more-less, right-left, up-down; name colors and geometric shapes, parts of the body or animals, explain the rules of behavior or traffic, etc.

Options for toys and the skills they develop

This bracelet will be useful for a very small baby (from 2 to 4 months). It will contribute to the development of the baby's hearing and vision, as well as coordination of movements.

Beads (sling beads)

Sling beads develop color perception, tactile sensations, and teach the child to pick and roll small elements. In addition to beads, you can attach several small knitted animals or fruits.

Pillow with buttons

Despite its apparent lightness, the toy is quite interesting. develop the baby's tactile perception. Take it with you on the road and ask your child (depending on his age) to find all the buttons of a certain color, count them (on the entire pillow, in one row or column), find the largest or smallest button of a certain color in a row or on the entire pillow, show which button is to the right of the small blue one, etc.

Book

Develops fine motor skills, teaches you to name animals, allows you to study colors and geometric shapes.

Stand with locks

I'm sure the boys will be absolutely delighted! After all, there is so much that can be opened, unfastened, turned and pressed. Making a development stand is quite simple; most of the elements can be found in any man’s pantry.

Rug - fairy tale

The rug develops the child's speech and imagination. Simple guiding questions from parents will help the child quickly master these skills (Can you imagine that Kolobok turned the other way? Who will he meet? Etc.)

Greetings to all!

Today our guest is Marina Suzdaleva, psychologist, author of the project Club of Passionate Mothers. Marina’s website on how to develop a child at home.

As part of our “toy week,” Marina agreed to give me an interview about what to do if a child constantly throws toys around, how to maintain order in the nursery and teach a child to be neat.

At the end yours awaits nice gift from Marina.

I won’t keep you waiting for long, let’s move on to the interview.

Elena: Marina, tell us a little about yourself and why you decided to help mothers in maintaining order in the children's room?

Elena: Yes, “debris in the nursery” is indeed a very lively topic. Marina, what should be done from a very early age in a child to instill in him the skills of neatness?

Marina: There are several simple and understandable rules that should be followed so that the child grows up neatly. And the sooner you start following them, the better: there is a high probability that the baby will absorb the tendency to order “with mother’s milk”, and this useful feature will become a trait of his character. So, what are these rules:

1. Lead by example. Until adolescence, parents are role models for the child, so, as they say, “you hold the cards.”
2. Support your baby's initiative. It is very important not to miss the moment when the child begins to show a natural tendency to organize toys and other objects, as well as a desire to “help” mom and dad with the housework.
3. Turn cleaning into a game. It is the game that is a natural activity for a child under 7 years old; in the game the child learns and gets to know the world around him, so forget the boring words “duties” and “cleaning” and organize putting things in order in the form of an exciting game.
4. Never punish your child by “cleaning up.” This is the surest way to make the baby hate putting things in order and everything connected with it.
5. Don't be stingy with praise. And even if the baby is not doing everything perfectly yet, be sure to find something to praise him for - say, for putting away toys on his own initiative or simply trying very, very hard.

Elena: At what age should a child be taught to collect toys?

Marina: I repeat, the sooner the better. I am sure that even when the baby is just beginning his first independent movements around the apartment, he begins to form his first ideas about order. And if, in an attempt to create an enriched environment for a child, we overload the nursery with a variety of educational toys and bright things - it is this picture that becomes a kind of standard of order for the child. So if you are the mother of a child under one year old, keep order in the nursery and do not forget to pronounce your actions. “Did you play with the matryoshka doll? We need to put her in her place. Do you want mom to read about kolobok? Then let's put the cubes together into a box. Well done!" and so on. This will help the child learn the basics of neatness earlier.

At the age of about a year, a child needs to be purposefully involved in cleaning up toys and it is best to turn this activity into part of a ritual - for example, before bed: collect toys, take a bath, put on pajamas, read a fairy tale, or before a walk: collect toys, go to the potty, get dressed. This is how a habit is formed.

Elena: Marina, tell me, how and where is it better to store toys?

Marina: Before answering this question, let me remind you that there should not be too many toys. When the number of toys does not go beyond reason, organizing their convenient storage is much easier. There are now so many different options for storing toys that you can probably choose something that suits your child and fits exactly into your children's room. The most important thing is that toys should be clearly visible, easy to get and put away by the child without your participation, and each toy should have its own place.

Elena: You’re right, it’s very important to properly organize the space around the child. I know that you are an “advanced mother” in this matter.

Here's how Marina's toy storage is organized.

Elena: A child’s ideas about beauty are sometimes far from ideal, and it happens that the child stubbornly wants to put things in order. As a result, plasticine products appear on all the shelves and children's drawings are hung on the walls. What to do in such cases?

Marina: My answer to this question is clear. Let it be the way the baby likes it. Firstly, this is his nursery, not your bedroom or office! Even if the child does not have a separate room, be sure to allocate at least a small corner for him where he can create such order and such “beauty” as he deems necessary. And an “exhibition” of children’s drawings and crafts is one of the most important conditions for developing a child’s healthy self-esteem and maintaining interest in creative activities. So I am “all in favor” J In general, attempts to impose on a child the correct, from your point of view, way of establishing order can ruin the child’s initiative, but you and I agreed that we will support it in every possible way.

Elena: Yes, I agree with you, personal space is simply necessary for a baby.

But what to do in cases where the child is already 5-6 years old, but neatness skills have not been instilled? The child is lazy and refuses to maintain order.

Marina: Of course, at 5-6 years old it is unlikely that it will be possible to make a tendency towards order a character trait, but it is very possible to cultivate such a habit. The most important thing is the consistency of the parents, the unity of demands from different family members, again, personal example and play form. And at this age, it is extremely important to correctly position household chores - not as a duty, but as a privilege. This will not be difficult to do if you do not find out in front of your child who will have to take out the bucket today, and do household chores playfully, with a smile on your face. Yes, another important point - children at this age have a heightened sense of justice, so if your older brother or dad gets away with throwing socks around the apartment, don’t expect to instill neatness in your child.

Elena: Marina, how do you feel about mom’s spontaneous raids on the nursery? Many women don't have enough time to clean during the week and only clean on the weekends. And then the nerves can no longer stand it, and in the nursery “mama passed by”, it just starts to infuriate, and the mother tries to quickly “scatter” everything in its place. And cleaning turns into a cycle: all rooms are cleaned and cleaning can begin again.

Marina: Although my working day is only a few hours, I don’t want cleaning to take me more than 15 minutes a day, and “general work” on weekends is also not an option for me. To help mothers who want to forget about general cleaning, the FLY-lady system is now very widespread; anyone can find all the necessary information by typing this phrase into any search engine. To answer your question, “spontaneous raids on the nursery”, “scattering in places” and “circulation of disorder” can and should be avoided - everything is in our hands!

Elena: Marina, I heard that you are currently hosting a flash mob “Order in the nursery in 5 days!” Tell us in more detail, what interesting things will you do there and is it possible to join the flash mob now?

Great! Marina, thank you for the invitation to participate, and for this most interesting interview! I was very intrigued by my flash mob. I’ll go myself and invite the readers of my blog. This is an offer you can't miss.

Become a flash mob participant Organize your nursery in 5 days!

Psychologists recommend cultivating cleanliness and accuracy even in preschool age. These are unborn qualities. The baby acquires them with age and thanks to his parents. In order for the concept of responsibility to be formed, and for children to show interest and respect for work from an early age, start small. Try teaching your child to clean up his toys. This is not easy, since the same educational measures are unacceptable in mastering a skill. You can use any approaches and methods, except coercion. Ultimatums and punishments are inappropriate in this matter; they cause nothing but negative associations. There are other ways out that are more interesting, useful and safe for the child’s psyche.

Teaching a child to collect his toys

The sooner parents teach how to keep order, the better the results will be. This is a proven fact, but in your desire to raise a hardworking, clean dog, it is important not to overdo it and take into account age characteristics.

Children begin to respond to requests at the age of 1–1.5 years. They can already get something, bring it, assemble it, etc. This is the ideal age for learning order and the “play with it, put it away” rule. Up to 2 years old, children respond to any requests with pleasure, do not protest or be capricious. Older children behave differently. At 2.5–3 years old, the time for experimentation begins, when mom and dad are tested for strength, namely, whether they are ready to give in if they are not obeyed. At this age, the child has more activities and hobbies, they are no longer so impressed by praise, so finding the right approach and teaching them to order is much more difficult. If the mother, without waiting for a reaction, starts cleaning up the toys herself, the baby will understand that the protest worked, and in the future he will actively use his ability to manipulate.

In such situations, much depends on the behavior of adults. Temporary disorder can be tolerated, but the disobedience of a growing sloth will be more difficult to cope with. If the child ignored your words and does not want to put away his toys, wait until he wants something. As soon as the request is made, kindly remind them that the toys have not been collected. Let him get used to the fact that unfinished things need to be completed. This is a good quality and will come in handy in the future.

Compliance and excessive severity of parents are equally useless. To teach children to collect toys, follow these proven rules.

Lead by example

It is difficult to explain what order is to a small child. Good things must be taught by personal example. You cannot demand what you do not do yourself. Mess is memorable. Children get used to any conditions and, if from birth they see mountains of unwashed dishes and things scattered around the apartment, this becomes the norm. The baby copies the behavior of the parents. In the absence of a worthy example to follow, he will not show interest in cleaning up his toys.

Learn while playing and share responsibilities

Alone and without reminders, a child is unlikely to start cleaning. I'll have to remind you. It is very easy to captivate small children as young as 3 years old with an interesting game. He instantly responds to his parents’ invitation to compete, for example, who can assemble a pyramid faster or put pencils in a box.

Don't insist on independence. If the room is in complete chaos, the amount of work for a small child may be overwhelming. Clean up with your child, let him collect the cubes, and you fold the books. This way, you can not only teach them to maintain order, but also teach you how to determine a place for each toy: cars in the garage, a construction set in a box, a doll in a stroller, etc. The main thing is to immediately make it clear that your participation is only help.

If your child categorically refuses to clean up toys, hide his favorite toy. When he remembers and starts looking for her, tell him that she was offended and went to a kinder and more thrifty owner. This works, but in order for the child to understand everything correctly, be sure to return the item and tell him what needs to be done so that it does not happen again.

Don't force, encourage

Cleaning up toys should not be a one-time event. Teach your child to clean things up regularly. If a child enthusiastically tidies up after himself today, this does not mean that tomorrow he will do the same with the same enthusiasm. If they refuse to fulfill your request, the easiest way is to threaten and shout, but this is not a solution. You can ask, but persistently and firmly, avoiding a threatening or commanding tone.

Praise your efforts, encourage and encourage your child. You can suggest a walk, going to the circus or watching your favorite cartoon, but only after cleaning. This is not blackmail, but a good incentive. The promise to buy a new doll or car after the child fulfills the request is also a working incentive, but it is better not to abuse material gifts.

A child’s reluctance to put away toys may be caused by poor health or an adaptation period: enrollment in kindergarten, moving to a separate room, the appearance of a brother or sister, etc. Do not bother the child with persistent requests during the period of change.

conclusions

It will not be possible to quickly teach a child to order. Whims and protests are inevitable and you need to prepare yourself for this. Do not focus on noisy refusals, do not give in when your requests are refused, and do not raise your voice at a rebellious child. Threats, coercion, and accusations are prohibited educational techniques. An irritated screaming mother will only scare you. Behavior and actions teach better than words, so order and cleanliness should be the rule for the whole family.

You can find many similar articles in our section on raising children.

Video on the topic

Almost every families Where there is a small child, there is a problem of how to get the baby to clean up his toys. Here is the most common picture that is familiar to many modern parents: “Parents sit and watch TV, the baby plays with his toys. At the same time, the child’s concentration on any one game or toy changes every 5 minutes.

Switching attention for another game, the baby simply leaves the toy and takes out another one. Within an hour, scattered around the house, they give the impression that a real hurricane has passed through the room. Parents enjoy watching their baby play independently, but only until the very minute they ask him to put away his toys. The baby does not react in any way to the parents’ requests and flatly refuses to obey.” The most common mistake parents make in such a situation is that they force the child to put away toys, resorting to threats and punishment. This should not be done under any circumstances.

Every parent wants to raise his child to be a responsible and hardworking person. The child responds to parents’ requests for help starting at the age of one. He can bring something, put dirty clothes in the washing machine, get a book or toy. From this same age, we must begin to teach him to master the main rule of behavior: if he plays, clean up after himself. If you ask a child who is only 1 year old to put away his toys, he is unlikely to start rebelling and being capricious. But children aged 2-3 years are already beginning to show their character and test their parents’ strength. They are interested in knowing how mom or dad will behave if he refuses to obey.

In any age You don’t have to start fighting with your child or cleaning up his toys yourself. Even if you were unable to force the child to fulfill your request, never collect his toys immediately yourself, wait until the child turns to you with some request. For example, if he asks you to look at a book together, tell him kindly and firmly that you will do what he asks only after he puts his toys away. From a young age, a child must understand that it is impossible to start a second task while leaving the first unfinished. He must know that his parents will read a book to him, draw and play together only when he follows the rules that all family members must adhere to.

Useless demand from the child to maintain order and cleanliness, if the parents themselves do not believe that neatness and regular cleaning of the house are necessary. If there are constantly mountains of scattered toys and things lying on the floor that no one cleans up during the week, then asking the child to remove them is pointless and stupid. He simply cannot cope with such a task without the help of his parents and will experience fear every time from the sight of the toys themselves.

Ever since age When a child starts playing with toys, parents should show him an example of caring for them. Help your child master simple actions in handling toys. If you bought a new toy, show him how to play with it and where it should be put away after the game is over. There is no need to try to keep all the toys in sight of the child; leave only those that are most interesting to him and that correspond to his age. Put the rest in a secluded place and take it out only when necessary. When there are a lot of toys scattered around, your request to remove them seems impossible to the child. In this case, he cannot do without his mother’s help.

Suggest for your baby to put the toys together and divide the cleaning process into simple steps: “Mom will put the blocks in a box, and you put this car in the garage. Well done! This is the kind of helper I’m growing! Now put the ball in the box, and I’ll put together a pyramid.” Thus, by sorting toys by type, you will teach your baby not only to put them away, but also teach him to determine a place for each toy. He should know that books should be put where books are, cars are next to cars, dolls are next to dolls, and so on. If the mother herself irritably throws all the toys into one large box, instead of patiently collecting them with the child, and every time she carelessly shakes out this box to get the right toy, then there is no point in asking the child to handle the toys carefully. He will behave just like his mother. Scatter them and throw them so that they break faster.

If the child played with a toy and wants to take the next one, immediately ask him to first put the toy he played with back in its place. Small children may not understand their mother’s request, help him and say: “Now you and I will put this car back in its place, you don’t want to play with him anymore. Let her sleep in the garage for now, and you and I will take the pyramid.” If your child refuses to put away a toy, hide it discreetly.

Later some time ask him where this toy is. Let the baby search, and when he doesn’t find it, tell him a fairy tale about how the toy lay on the floor for a long time, then went to look for its place, didn’t find it, and another owner took it to live with him. This owner turned out to be very neat and kind; he plays with the toy very carefully and puts it back in its place every time. Before returning the toy, warn your child that if he does not put it back after playing, it will disappear again. So, step by step, instill in your child a sense of responsibility and accuracy.

Given that patient and painstaking work on your part, by the age of 3 your baby will put his toys and books back in their place. Of course, no one will be able to teach a child order in one day or even in a month. At first, whims, tears and actions aimed at spite of you are inevitable. You shouldn't get angry or irritated because of this. Try not to focus on the child’s whims and do not put away the toys yourself. Help him, but at the same time give the child the opportunity to clearly understand that he puts away the toys, and you are only helping him.