Funeral words

reflection of grief and pain of loss

The death of loved ones, relatives, and friends is always a sad and tragic event in the life of every person. At such moments, it can be difficult to find the right words to express all the sorrow and pain. How can you say that the deceased was dear? That he was the most wonderful person? Clearly and clearly articulate his best qualities without going too far? A funeral speech at a funeral is a text that is pronounced not from a piece of paper, but from the heart.

Funeral speech - sample

First you need to say your name. Not everyone present at a funeral or wake knows you. It should be remembered that long, vague, expansive phrases are suitable for political debates, but not for funeral speeches. You should speak briefly and to the point. So, examples of speech at a wake:

“I’ll introduce myself for those who don’t know me: my name is (name). We have worked together with (name of deceased) for the past few years and I would like to say a few words in memory of him.

He was a true professional in his field, a Specialist with a capital S. Many of our colleagues, young and not only, learned the basics of their craft from him and often used his advice and help. He was very patient and responsive, he could always listen to everyone who turned to him for support, advise something, help out, and never refused anyone’s requests. He could perfectly lift the spirits of anyone who was upset, confused or depressed about something. The countless funny stories, toasts, jokes and anecdotes he told could amuse anyone. We will all greatly miss him at our dinner gatherings and corporate events, where he invariably shone at the table, lifting our morale. There is no other person like him in our team. And maybe in my memory it will no longer be

We will all miss him greatly. Until the end of his life, he will remain in my memory and the memory of all our colleagues as an example of perseverance, sparkling cheerfulness, activity and professionalism!

Rest in peace, dear colleague!”

“My grandmother was a wonderful person with a difficult but interesting life. She, along with her three younger brothers and sister, were raised by her mother alone during the difficult post-war years. To say that they lived poorly then would be an understatement. She had to endure many difficulties and hardships, but she never lost her optimism and presence of mind, constantly helping her mother and taking care of the younger members of the family. And later, having married her military grandfather, she steadfastly endured all the hardships of service. In any circumstances, she always maintained exemplary order at home and taught all family members to do so. Grandma was sometimes strict, but fair. I am glad that I managed to learn from her neatness and order, the ability to organize my life. And her famous apple pies were simply incomparable, no one else could do them!

I will always remember you, my dear, beloved grandmother! Your warmth, love and care will remain with us forever"

How to choose the right words?

Based on the examples presented above, several basic rules can be identified:

• It is best to address the audience in the introduction. For example: “Dear friends and family of our beloved (name) ....”
• It is necessary to introduce yourself. What does it have to do with not only the name, but also the degree of your acquaintance, relationship: “My name is Alexey, (name) and I have been close friends (colleagues) for many (you can be more specific) years.”
• It would not be amiss to say a few words about your own experiences, about the pain that the announcement of death caused.
• The following words characterize the deceased. Here it is important to remember the old Russian proverb, which perfectly indicates what they say at funerals: “It’s either good or nothing about the dead.”
• In conclusion, condolences or standard, but still relevant memorial words are said: “May he rest in peace,” “Rest in peace,” and so on.

In general, we note that the speech at the wake differs from the one pronounced directly at the funeral. So, at the moment of farewell it is customary to speak very briefly. Here, words of condolences are mainly spoken to the relatives of the deceased.

The funeral speech on the day of the funeral should under no circumstances be a memorized text. A few words from the heart, imbued with sincere empathy, would be more appropriate. In the first days, the relatives of the deceased are unable to perceive reality. The grief they have suffered is too hard for them, so their feelings should be respected.

Memorial words for 40 days, for an anniversary can be more intense. Here they often remember the best about the deceased. But even after time, one should not remember insults, disagreements and quarrels. If you can’t overcome this in yourself, the best thing to do is to remain silent or limit yourself to a couple of standard phrases.

Funeral poems

It was already indicated above that poetry would be extremely inappropriate at a funeral. A memorial speech for 40 days, 1 year may contain a small poetic inclusion. These could be the words of great poets or lines from an epitaph. Memorial poems for the anniversary of death mostly contain warm words that can be attributed to the personality of the deceased, and to a lesser extent condolences and bitterness. Examples include:

When parents leave
The light in the window fades forever.
Father's house is empty and maybe
I dream much more often.
* * *
We know you can't be brought back
Your deeds are an eternal memory,
And only your pure soul is with us,
You illuminate our life's path.

* * *
Sleep, my angel, peacefully and sweetly.
Eternity will take you into its arms.
You held yourself with dignity and steadfastness
Survived these hellish torments.
* * *
On this day full of heartache,
We sympathize with your misfortune,
Our life, unfortunately, is not eternal,
Every day we are getting closer to the line...
Our condolences... Strength of spirit
We wish you at this moment,
May the earth rest in peace to those close to you,
May the Almighty protect you from troubles.
* * *
When you left, the light went dark,
And time suddenly stopped.
And they wanted to live together forever...
Well, why did this all happen?!
* * *
May your sleep be serene
No one will ever disturb you,
Nothing can break it
Oblivion of eternal peace.
* * *
Thank you, dear, for being in the world!
Thank you for loving me.
For all the years that we lived together.
I ask you not to forget me.
* * *
We remember, dear, and mourn,
The wind blows coldly on my heart.
We love you forever,
No one will replace you for us.
* * *
How we loved - only the Gods know.
Only we knew how we suffered.
After all, we went through all the hardships with you,
But we could not step over death...
* * *
In this vicious circle - no matter what -
It will not be possible to find the end and the beginning.
Our role in this world is to come and go.
Who will tell us about the goal, about the meaning of the path?

* * *
There are no, Lord, sins and atrocities
Above Thy mercy!
Slave/slave of the earth and vain desires
Forgive the sins for his/her sorrows!

What was his life like? - Heavy sleep.
What is death? - Awakening from terrible dreams.
Woke up, he smiled -
And again, maybe the dream began there.
* * *
You left and it immediately began to snow.
May you have a good time there.
Let him cover himself with a soft white blanket
The land where you are no longer there...
* * *
Without chasing meaningless fame,
Keeping love in your heart,
He left, but managed to leave us
Eternal music bright motive
* * *
This order is unshakable.
The passage of time is eternal.
Let it be quiet and sweet
Your peaceful sleep!

Funeral poems are published in the newspaper as condolences. Words at the wake should not contain ambiguous phrases. Extremely clear and understandable lines for all those present will be the most appropriate and correct.

Funeral toasts

The funeral usually ends with a memorial dinner. While at such a table, you must follow the rules of mourning etiquette. It is not allowed to talk loudly or laugh. You should not interrupt the person making a speech at the wake. Often at the table, speech takes the form of a toast. Funeral toasts at a wake are significantly different from ordinary ones. They do not contain a call for fun, but once again emphasize the bitterness and pain of loss.

They sit in the next world, in Paradise, souls at the table, talking, drinking, pouring more. One overturned his jug, but it was empty. “That’s it,” he said, “I’ve been forgotten on Earth.” So let’s drink so that the jugs of our departed loved ones do not become empty!

Blessed memory of those who have left us, Let us drink to this now. May our hearts, like granite, preserve the memory of loved ones who have passed away. Let all the good things that happened to them not be buried in a damp grave. As long as we preserve our memories, they will live with us for as long.

Toasts at a wake can be pronounced in poetic form:

The philosopher knew that everything has its time,
Fate cannot be deceived:
The poet has been lonely for centuries -
May the glorious one be completed...

There is no water in the funeral cup!
Let's not grieve:
The midnight star will rise -
We will meet again!

Let it pour from the righteous peaks,
Before the days are gone,
The melody of your soul -
Why be sad about her?

Christian wake

One of the most widespread religions is Orthodoxy. Orthodox funerals differ significantly from secular ones. So, for example, speeches at funerals are practically not spoken for 40 days, 1 year. Christians gather at the table these days and pray together for the soul of the deceased. It is also customary these days to go to church and submit memorial notes, a sample of which can be seen in the church shop.

loss of a loved one

Condolences on the occasion of death will show true empathy for the loss of a person who is experiencing great shock and needs moral support. Death is always around us, but we notice it only when it knocks on our house or the house of a truly loved one. Such a death takes you by surprise and no one is ever prepared for the fact that on that day they lost someone dear to them. As Bulgakov once noted in his immortal masterpiece, the problem is not that man is mortal. The main problem is that he is suddenly mortal.

Texts of condolences

• I mourn your loss. I know this is a hard blow for you
• We offer our sincere condolences to all family and friends
• I was told that your brother died. I'm very sorry, I mourn with you
• A wonderful man has passed away. I send my condolences to you and your entire family at this sad and difficult moment.
• This tragedy has hurt all of us. But of course, it affected you the most. My condolences
• I understand how difficult it is to lose a loved one. I'm really sorry. Perhaps I can help you with something now?
• Sincere condolences to family and friends. Big loss for us. Her memory will be in our hearts. We mourn together with our families.
• Please accept our sincere condolences. May God reward her in heaven for all the good she did. She is and will remain in our hearts...
• We offer you and your entire family our deepest condolences on your tragic death... We share your grief and offer you words of support and consolation. We pray for the deceased... With condolences,...
• Sincere condolences to the family and friends of the untimely departed... from our entire family. It is very bitter to lose your loved ones, family and friends, and doubly bitter if the young, beautiful and talented leave us. May God rest his soul.
• Everyone who knew him is grieving now, because such a tragedy cannot leave anyone indifferent. I understand how difficult it is for you right now. I will never be able to forget him and I assure you that I will support you in every possible way, should you contact me.
• We mourn with you the untimely passing of... Over the years of our friendship, we knew him as.... This is a great loss for everyone, we express our sincere condolences to the parents, all relatives and friends. May God bless his soul.
• They say they love their grandchildren even more than their children. And we felt this love of our grandmother (grandfather) to the fullest. Their love will warm us all our lives, and we, in turn, will pass on a piece of this warmth to our grandchildren and great-grandchildren - may the sun of love never fade...
• There is nothing worse and more painful than losing a child. It is impossible to find such words of support to ease your pain even a little. One can only imagine how difficult it is for you right now. Please accept our sincere condolences on the death of your dear daughter.
• Dear... I may not have known your father very well personally, but I know how much he meant in your life, because you so often spoke about his love of life, sense of humor, wisdom, care for you... I think that many people will miss him grab I pray to God for you and your family.
• There are no words to express how deeply we mourn the death... . She was a wonderful, kind woman. We cannot even imagine how much of a blow her passing was for you. We miss her endlessly and remember how she once... She was a model of tact and mercy. We are happy that she was in our lives. You can count on our help at any moment.
• I am truly sorry for the loss of your dad. I express my sincere sympathy to all of you and know this is a very sad and sad time for you. I know from my own life how deep the loss is when you realize that he will no longer be in your life. I can tell you, the only thing that can help you get over your loss is your memories. Your father lived a long and full life and achieved a lot in his life. He will always be remembered as a hardworking, intelligent and loving man. My thoughts and prayers will be with you all. May you find solace in your family and friends who share your loss. My deepest condolences.

Condolences in verse

When parents leave
The light in the window fades forever.
Father's house is empty and maybe
I dream much more often.

* * *
Sleep, my angel, peacefully and sweetly.
Eternity will take you into its arms.
You held yourself with dignity and steadfastness
Survived these hellish torments.

* * *
On this day full of heartache,
We sympathize with your misfortune,
Our life, unfortunately, is not eternal,
Every day we are getting closer to the line...
Our condolences... Strength of spirit
We wish you at this moment,
May the earth rest in peace to those close to you,
May the Almighty protect you from troubles.

When you left, the light went dark,
And time suddenly stopped.
And they wanted to live together forever...
Well, why did this all happen?!

* * *
Thank you, dear, for being in the world!
Thank you for loving me.
For all the years that we lived together.
I ask you not to forget me.

We remember, dear, and mourn,
The wind blows coldly on my heart.
We love you forever,
No one will replace you for us.

* * *
How we loved - only the Gods know.
Only we knew how we suffered.
After all, we went through all the hardships with you,
But we could not step over death...

What does true empathy look like?

Real support should not resemble standard ritual phrases that are said just for the sake of saying. These phrases will not play a decisive role for anyone who has just lost the most dear person on the entire planet. How to express condolences on a death? What rules should you follow so that your words of condolences regarding death are not perceived as words without meaning and content?

The first rule is: Don’t keep your feelings in your heart.

Did you come to the funeral? Come and describe what you feel now. Don't hold back your emotions and feelings. There is no need to be ashamed of what you feel. After all, it was not in vain that you came to this funeral and knew the person. Sometimes it is better to say a few kind words through tears and hug the relatives or loved ones of the deceased than to speak hundreds of words, playing the role of a great speaker. Warm words are what everyone is waiting for, from whom heaven has taken away a piece of their soul.

Second rule: Condolences about death are not just words.

Can't find the right words for this situation? Don't say too much. Sometimes it's better to just hug or touch the grieving person. Shake hands, cry next to you. Show that the person was not left alone in this grief. Show your grief as best you can. You shouldn’t do everything in a formulaic way and pretend that you’re very sorry if you’re not. A person will immediately understand where there will be falsehood and where there are true feelings and words. A simple handshake is a good chance to express condolences over a death for those who are not very close to the family of the deceased, but came to pay tribute by seeing the person off on his last journey.

Rule Three: Offer whatever help you can.

You shouldn’t limit yourself to just words of grief. Not only in word, but also in deed! This rule has always been relevant. You can offer your help to the family of the deceased. For example, a mother with children could lose their sole breadwinner, which means that all these people become victims of deteriorating financial conditions. It is not necessary to help with money. If you can help in another way, offer to help. Such a move will only confirm that you are helping not only with words, but also with deeds. Don't turn your condolences into dead sentences with your words. Back them up with action. Even banal help in organizing a funeral can become very valuable in the eyes of a grieving person who received a blow below the belt so unexpectedly. Do good deeds and they will be appreciated more than just words.

Fourth rule— Pray for the deceased along with people who have lost a loved one.

Sincere prayer can be seen from afar - that’s what all the priests and monks say. This is exactly what should be done in the case of condolences. After a few words, the grieving person should pray for the deceased along with the one who is now experiencing the loss. Prayer calms all believers and will bring at least a little harmony into the wounded heart of the grieving person. Prayer distracts even from the greatest grief. Ask God for consolation for those who are suffering severe torment and do not understand why fate took a loved one from them. The prayer will not take much time, but will leave a wonderful impression on those who are now standing in front of you in black clothes and calling on heaven for help and asking for a logical explanation.

Fifth rule - Remember everything positive that you know about the deceased.

In order to say real words of consolation, you need to remember all the best things that connect you with him. Did you play football together as a child? Come and tell me that you couldn't find a better teammate. Did he save your dog? Did you let me cheat in class or in university classes? Remember this too. Mentioning original moments from the life of the deceased will only make loved ones smile. If a smile does not appear on your face, it will be in your soul. The deceased could teach you a lot and bring you joy. Share your memories and in a few minutes you will do the impossible - give a spark of joy to those who are now grieving. Did you have a bad relationship with a person who left this world? Then you should understand that people close to him are not to blame for the small disagreements between you. Forget about all the problems that have happened so far, because when trouble knocks on the door, you should forget about everything.

Rule six: Don’t talk about how things will be easier in the future.

There is no point in telling parents who have lost their child that they still have a lot of time to create another small miracle. They should not give hope that time will subsequently heal all wounds, because it is at this moment that it seems to them that life will no longer be the same as always. This is precisely the greatest truth of life - everyone understands that life without a loved one will no longer be the same as before his death. Everyone who is now crying at a funeral has just lost their little piece of their soul. A woman who has lost her husband should not be told that she is a real goddess and will definitely not be on her own in this life. Condolences for the death of mom or dad should also not contain calls for future peace and consolation. Let the person grieve the loss and don't talk about future prospects. Any words about the future will be superfluous, since no one believes in it now and will not see the picture you paint.

Seventh rule: Don’t say that everything will pass. Don't say that you shouldn't cry and grieve.

Most people who say these things have never lost a loved one. Just yesterday a person kissed in bed and drank morning dark tea with his beloved, and in the evening she may no longer be in this world. Just yesterday children quarreled with their parents, but tomorrow they may not be there. Just yesterday there was a party with friends, and tomorrow one of them may be taken away by the sky. And the understanding that you can’t bring your loved one back is the worst thing that can happen in this life. Therefore, there is no need to say that crying will not help here. There is no need to say that you shouldn’t grieve and “destroy” yourself morally so much. There is no need to play the role of a psychologist and delve into the psychological state of a person in grief. The first person who says that there is no point in crying only proves that he does not understand the mourner. There is no way to bypass serious stress - just let a person cry who cannot understand why he has now lost the meaning of his life.

Eighth rule - Forget about empty words, among which the most popular phrase is “Everything will be fine”!

Don't make promises you can't keep. Do not talk about optimistic plans for a person, because he will not perceive it the way you want to present it. A person does not want to hear platitudes and excuses that are so formal that they have become traditional. It is better to help with deeds, rather than saying traditional phrases from films where the main characters are often buried.

Ninth rule - Don't be shy about your feelings!

You came to a funeral, not a holiday. Therefore, be prepared that you will want to hug the relatives of the deceased even when you do not know them at all. In grief, everyone is the same. Don’t be shy about feelings that can cover you in a big wave. Do you want a hug? Hug! Would you like a handshake or a touch on the shoulder? Do it! Did a tear roll down your cheek? Don't turn away. Swipe it away. May you be one of those who came to this funeral for a reason. You have come to a loved one who deserves this.

The main conclusion that can be drawn, taking these rules into account, is that you should avoid cliched words of condolences to the relatives of the deceased and actions that will not bring any benefit. Tactless phrases will not do any good. There are words that will only once again cause misunderstandings on the other side, not to mention possible aggression, insult or even disappointment. Perhaps you were a close person to the deceased, and now you are not behaving as his family expects. You must enter the state of shock in which the person is now. Put yourself in the place of the grieving person and then you will understand how to behave correctly. Do not forget that everything you say may not be perceived as it sounds in your mouth. The psychological burden on those who lose a loved one is incredibly large and this is the decisive moment.

What can you offer a grieving person at a funeral?

Ask how you can help. Perhaps the matter will not be in the material dimension at all, although money in this case is never superfluous. The family of the deceased may entrust you to go to the priest or simply agree on the purchase and transportation of the coffin. A small favor to the family, which is now in a difficult state, will not be superfluous. Indeed, at this moment, none of the deceased’s relatives can adequately assess the situation and their thoughts are not at all about the problematic aspects of organizing a funeral. Have you heard that even after a murder, friends of the deceased say that they must first bury him with honors, and only then look for the killer? The point is that the etiquette of expressing condolences is very interconnected with funerals. Do your best to make sure this funeral goes well, because every person deserves to pass away with the respect of others.

Offer your help in any way. Help will be received well in any case, and even if you are refused, they will still be pleased. Even ordering memorial cards for invitations to funerals or helping to accommodate guests from distant cities in your home would be a wonderful service. Just don’t talk about everything in such a tone as if you are offering just for the sake of simply offering. Offer specific help and receive real gratitude.

Be concise, like King Leonidas when he addresses the Spartans!

Words of condolences should be kept short. No one should speak for long because funerals are not the place for great speakers. Leave thousands of words to the priest who will perform the funeral service for the deceased. Keep it short and say exactly what you think. You should also not speak for a long time at a wake, since too heavy phrases cause distraction and lose their meaning. Don't be afraid to experiment in front of the mirror with a few phrases that you have prepared for yourself. Warm and sincere words are usually very short, like a declaration of love. Love needs no words, and the deceased is worth only a few sincere sentences. Do not forget that it is easy to feel false condolences, since at such times the relatives and friends of the deceased can boast of an increased sense of sincerity and falseness. Kind words can heal the soul and heart of those who are hurt or heartbroken.

What should those who had a conflict with the deceased do? How to behave and do the relatives and friends of the deceased need condolences from such a person?

Find the strength within yourself to forgive the one who was carried away by the sky. After all, death is the end point of all grievances. If you have done something wrong to the deceased, come and pay tribute. Ask for forgiveness in prayer, even if you are not sure you will receive it. Speak sincerely and the relatives of the deceased will accept it with honor. Leave negativity and unnecessary emotions at home. Do not forget that all grievances die with the person. Do you really regret your fault or just respect your competitor in some way? Come and show his loved ones that he was such a respected person that even his enemies came to honor his memory. Do you have a grudge against the deceased? Forgive and let go. Show this to his loved ones and they will be glad once again that you have forgiven.

Be original!

It's always better to come up with a few good phrases that are your own to say to the loved ones of the deceased. By coming up with these words, you can remember something from a person’s past. Perhaps you know something about him that others will not say. Perhaps you know something that your loved ones don’t know. Or perhaps your friend rarely told his parents that he loved them, but in fact always noted to his friends that he had the best parents in the world? Why don't you sympathize and remember this? Remember something interesting. Say something truly valuable to everyone.

What should you talk about during condolences?

Say that the person was not just good. Say that it is difficult to find words. Let everyone know that the deceased deserves more words than can be said now. Tell him he was talented. Good. Give examples that will confirm your words. Set him as an example to many present. Say that you loved the deceased person. Let everyone know he will be missed. Say that this is a tragedy for you. Tell us about what you are grateful for to the deceased and what exactly he did for you. Tell those present that the role of the deceased in your life was great or, on the contrary, not so great, but despite this the world has lost one of the best representatives of humanity. Take breaks. Allow yourself to choose your words. Let everyone see that it is really difficult for you to pick them up. Tell the truth!

Will so-called religious condolences always be appropriate?

Religious rhetoric will not always be helpful, since the deceased could be an atheist or profess a different faith. You should not use phrases taken from the Bible in all cases, because this may not please many who come. Make sure you can afford it. Only in this case can you turn your words about the deceased into quotes from the Bible and supplement them with sincere sympathy. Moreover, the deceased could be an agnostic, like the people grieving behind him. In this case, you should also not speak in religious phrases.

Is someone who has lost a loved one really a believer? Then you can correctly select phrases from the church sphere, having first studied all religious epitaphs more deeply. They can push you onto the right path and thoughts. Just don’t forget that there shouldn’t be too much religiosity. In this case, measures are needed more than ever.

Despite this, religious themes in condolences will not always be a good option and it is not without reason that most people ignore them. It is better not to use biblical phrases, but to say in your own words what is in your soul right now.

Is it worth expressing condolences in the form of poetry?

Not at a funeral. Even if the mourner loves poetry, a funeral is far from the time to pay tribute to rhyme. Why so categorical? Funeral home experts know thousands of cases where such verses were too inappropriate, and there is one small reason for this. Poems of condolences regarding death are always perceived differently by people. 2 people can explain one line of verse in different ways. One phrase can have different meanings depending on the poetry of the person listening. This is exactly the case when poems of grief and condolences are extremely common and popular, and an obituary in poetic form poses a real risk of remaining misunderstood.

Is it worth writing an SMS with condolences?

Never write SMS in any form if we are talking about a service that gives you the opportunity to send a short message. Can't meet in person? It’s better to call yourself and don’t express sympathy in this way. After all, you don’t know at what exact moment this message may arrive, and its too short format makes the words too laconic. It will convey facts, not feelings. The person will not feel your voice. His timbre. Its emotional coloring. Moreover, messages in such cases are perceived poorly. Was it really difficult to call if you still found a minute to write a message? Perhaps you didn’t want to talk at all, but wrote a message just to forget about it once and for all and not feel guilty?

Let your condolences be sincere! These words are so necessary for those who have lost a loved one. They will be grateful to you!

It should be understood that at a funeral a funeral speech is made, which is addressed to the entire circle of guests. A funeral is a rather difficult event and relatives choose a person with good diction and who knew the deceased well.

If you are reading a memorial speech, then you should not rely on improvisation; there is nothing wrong if you record the speech. Optimal speaking time up to 5 minutes. You should not retell the entire biography of the deceased. The speaker must select the brightest, most important, good moments that highlight all the best qualities of the deceased.

Since you personally knew the deceased, you can remember a kind deed, good words, or moments, and also emphasize how significant this person was to you. At the end of the speech they usually talk about what the deceased taught us, what benefits he did, that he did not live his life in vain.

In a funeral speech, you cannot recall the shortcomings and bad deeds of the deceased; remember that good things can be said about a bad person. For example, if a person was greedy, then we can say that although he did not always know how to share joy with others, he is an example for us of how to be happy ourselves and achieve everything with our own work! In this way, guests will learn about the deceased, his busy life, and good deeds.

Warm words warm the souls of guests and relatives, thus making the loss easier to bear.

An example of composing a speech:

1. Appeal:

Dear guests [Name]!
-Dear relatives and friends!
-Dear family and friends of our beloved [Name]

2. Who you are:

I am the husband of our revered [Name].
-I am the sister of [Name] whom we remember today.
-[Name] and I have worked/served together for a long time/in recent years.

3. About how it all happened:

My mother was ill for a long time; we understood what would happen, but when we got a call from the hospital...
-When I found out that [Name] died, that evening I couldn’t think about anything else.
-Although my grandfather lived a long life, the news of his death shocked me.
-Today is 9 days since my mother left us.
-A year ago we said goodbye to [Name], a respected and worthy person.

4. A few words about the best qualities of the deceased:

Grandmother was the kindest person, often receiving guests in her cozy house in the village.
-She was very generous, and her smile gave everyone a good mood.
-He was known as an optimist and a person with whom it was easy to go through life.
“He was a support for all of us; you could always rely on him in difficult times.

Remember that the eulogy at a funeral must come from your heart, just take a pen and write about what is in your soul, describe the deceased. It’s better if your speech is not formally correct, but sincere, which will touch the hearts of the guests.

Example of a funeral speech There are few facts from life here, but the speech was spoken from the heart:

Dear relatives and friends! I am the husband of our revered [Name]. Having learned about the tragedy, I could not believe what had happened for a long time, I could not think about anything all evening and it still seems to me that this was just a dream.
Not many people know how pure and bright a person [Name] was. Already at the age of 18, she made her first journey, and this passion for seeing new things remained forever in her heart. We met on one of these trips; it was an unforgettable month in an unforgettable city.
We both considered ourselves free as birds, and did not want to tie the knot, but this acquaintance turned everything upside down. She was an incredibly kind and sympathetic person. She always helped strangers, always took into account the opinions of others and avoided conflicts. I’m glad that, although for so little, I was with her and was able to enjoy the purity, tenderness and feelings that [Name] gave me. I will always remember you [Name], your warm smile will forever remain in our hearts!

What do they say at funerals?

At the wake, everyone can show their respect to the deceased. If you want to honor the memory of a loved one, prepare in advance, come up with a nice toast or poem to stand at the memorial table and honor the memory of your loved one.

Before sitting down to the table, the deceased is honored with a minute of silence. Orthodox Christians begin the commemoration by reading Psalm 90 and the Lord's Prayer. The owner of the house invites guests to the table and people sit down without sitting in the empty place allocated to the deceased.

First word given to the owner of the house: -Today we saw off our loved one on his last journey (calls him as was customary in the family). May he/she rest in peace and may his/her memory be eternal. (Bows to the portrait or empty space of the deceased).

Everyone drinks (according to tradition, jelly). Without clinking glasses. Then the word is given to the presenter. The presenter also makes his speech, concluding it with the words: - May the earth (says the name and patronymic of the deceased) rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal!

Then the leader gives mourning words to everyone from seniority to minority: As a rule, these are toasts, at the end of which they say May [Name] rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal!

In memorial words, the use of aphorisms, favorite expressions of the deceased, and stories from life is allowed. Any negative words, conversations about bad character traits, or showdowns are not allowed.

Example: Friends, today is a day of sorrow. There was a time when we had fun and rejoiced with someone who left us. But today you and I drink this cup of sorrow ourselves, seeing off a person close to us on their last journey. Not everyone in the world was honored with the Dormition, like the Mother of God and other holy people. But we will keep in our hearts the good memory of our friend, having hope for resurrection and a new meeting in a new place. Let's drink to the dregs the wine of sadness!

Example: We are sad and sad and there are no other feelings. Let's remember all the parents, Let's remember all the relatives! Let us remember all those who have passed away, In the prime of their lives, Brothers, sisters of the dead, Acquaintances and strangers! They once lived and made us happy, laughed and loved, took care of us. For a long time or recently They are no longer with us, And we reverently bring a bouquet to the grave!

Or just incidents from life, someone will remember how well he drew, someone will remember how well they worked together, and someone will talk about his good deed.

Example: “Our grandfather was a very kind and good person. His path was long and difficult. He perceived all the difficulties that befell the country as his own. He worked and raised children without complaining about the lack of benefits, lack of food or amenities. He raised children and was a support for his grandchildren. This magnificent man will be greatly missed by all of us. May his memory be blessed!”

The funeral words must be said while standing. After your funeral words, the head of the family must end your words with the phrase - May the earth (says the name and patronymic of the deceased) rest in peace, and may the memory be eternal! Or for the believers the Kingdom of heaven and eternal peace for him/her.

When everyone has spoken, the head of the house thanks everyone for their kind words and once again wishes everyone to be strong in order to survive the bitterness of loss and remain firm at all times. Everyone gets up, drinks, bows and sits down again. According to tradition, the last toast is made by the eldest woman in the family, or the eldest relative. She also thanks everyone for coming and honoring the memory of the deceased and, if necessary, invites everyone to the next commemoration. After the last toast, they do not say goodbye, but bow to the portrait of the deceased (or an empty place at the table) and on the way out they offer words of condolences to the relatives.

How to express condolences over a death?

What should you not say? Often on such difficult days, it is very difficult for us to formulate our thoughts and express our condolences correctly. We begin to speak in general phrases, instead of simply supporting people dear to us in difficult times. Let's consider what it is better not to say when expressing your condolences:

2. God judged, everything was God’s will, God took it away. You cannot say such a phrase to a mother who has lost a small innocent child, thereby you seem to be saying that God did this to them. It is better to say that now a person is in a better world.

3. How are you? There is no need to dryly ask relatives how they are doing; if there is a need to maintain a conversation, it is better to ask how you are feeling? What's on your mind? However, if you are not a loved one, then just inquire about the funeral itself and ask if there is anything I can do for you.

4. Everything will be fine, don't cry! You should not try to cheer up the relatives of the deceased with such expressions; after all, this is mourning and these days relatives most often want to think about today, and not about the future.

5. Future-oriented wishes do not belong to words of condolences: “I wish you to come to your senses quickly after such a tragedy”

6. It is considered bad form to find positive aspects in a tragedy and devalue the loss. No problem, give birth again! He was very sick and finally got over it! Remember that people here have gathered to honor the memory of the deceased.

7. You’re not the only one, it can be worse, that’s what happened with…..Such statements are tactless and do not help in any way to alleviate the pain of loss.

8. You can’t look for someone to blame. We hope this driver goes to jail! We hope this killer will be punished. Such statements also do not apply to words of condolences.

9. “You know, he drank a lot and was a drug addict, people like that don’t live long.” Such statements are also tactless, about the deceased it’s either good or nothing.

10. Questions “How and where did this happen?” and others, it is also not appropriate to ask when expressing condolences.

Verbal condolences to the loved ones of the deceased

The most important thing is that your words of condolences are sincere and from the heart. For example, if you did not know the deceased and his relatives well, then a simple handshake or hug with words of condolences for your loss will be enough. The same applies to people who simply have no words or only two words, I sympathize with you. You can simply hug, take your hand, put your hand on your shoulder, thereby showing that you sincerely sympathize and share your grief with the relatives of the deceased.

It is considered good form to offer your help, ask if there is something I can do for you? Most often they will politely answer you, no thanks, no need. But if help is really needed, then it can be help in preparing dishes for the funeral, in submitting notes to the church for conducting church liturgies for the deceased, and even financial assistance.

How to find words of condolences for a death?

To make it easier to express your condolences, think about the deceased, who he was to you, remember good incidents from life, his actions and joint affairs. Also think about the feelings of your loved ones, how hard it is for them, how they feel. This will help you choose words for your condolences.

If you feel guilty about something before the deceased, your sincere apologies will be good form, because condolences are both forgiveness and reconciliation. There is no need to squeeze words out of yourself, if there are none, then just come up and sincerely say how you condole, everything will be visible in your eyes. Below are examples of words of condolences:

He meant a lot to me and to you, I mourn with you. Let it be a consolation to us that he gave so much love and warmth.

Let's pray for him. There are no words to express your sorrow.

She meant a lot in your life and mine. Never forget…

It is very difficult to lose such a dear person. I share your grief. How can I help you? You can always count on me.

I'm very sorry, please accept my condolences. If I can do something for you, I will be very glad.

I would like to offer my help. I would be happy to help you...

Unfortunately, in this imperfect world we have to experience this. He was a bright man whom we loved. I will not leave you in your grief. You can count on me at any moment.

This tragedy affected everyone who knew her. Of course, it’s harder for you now than anyone else. I want to assure you that I will never leave you. And I will never forget her.

Please, let's walk this path together. Unfortunately, I only now realized how unworthy my bickering and quarrels with this bright and dear person were.

Excuse me! I mourn with you. This is a huge loss. And a terrible tragedy. I pray and will always pray for you and for him.

It is difficult to express in words how much good he did to me. All our differences are dust. And what he did for me, I will carry with me throughout my life. I pray for him and grieve with you. I will be happy to help you at any time.

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100 examples of condolences about death

How to Express Condolences for a Death to the relatives and friends of the deceased? Funeral words of sorrow and support in difficult times. Sincere words of condolences about the death - briefly.

Funeral words of grief for the deceased

Condolences are mourning words of sorrow who express sympathy over death. Sincere condolences provide for the format of a personal, personal appeal - verbal or text.

Within or in public, condolences are also appropriate, but there must be expressed briefly. In an expression of sympathy from a believer, you can add: "We pray for ___". More information about the rules of condolences can be found on the Epitaph.ru website.

Etiquette Muslim condolences It is distinguished by a fatal attitude towards death and acceptance of loss, as well as clear requirements for rituals, clothing, behavior, symbols, and gestures.

Examples of condolences

Universal short words of grief

In the case when words of condolences are pronounced after the burial or on the day of the funeral, you can (but not necessarily) add briefly: “May the earth rest in peace!” If you have the opportunity to provide assistance (organizational, financial - any), then this phrase is convenient to complete words of condolences, for example “These days you will probably need help. I would like to be of assistance. Count on me!

• I am shocked by this sad news. It's hard to accept. I share your pain of loss...
• My heart is broken by yesterday's news. I worry with you and remember ___ with the warmest words! It's hard to accept the loss of ___! Everlasting memory!
• The news of ___'s death is a terrible blow! It hurts to even think that we won't see him/her again. Please accept my and my husband's condolences for your loss!
• Until now, the news of ___'s death seems like a ridiculous mistake! It's impossible to comprehend this! Please accept my sincere condolences for your loss!
• My condolences! It hurts to even think about it, it’s hard to talk about. I sympathize with your pain! Everlasting memory ___!
• It's hard to put into words how much ___ and I feel for your loss ___! A golden man, of which there are few! We will always remember him/her!
• “This is an incredible, catastrophic loss. The loss of a real person, an idol, an exemplary family man and a citizen of his country" (about Ilya Segalovich). .
• We sympathize with your loss! The news of ___'s death shocked our entire family. We remember and will remember ___ as a most worthy person. Please accept our sincere condolences!
• It's small consolation, but know that we are with you in the grief of your loss ___ and our hearts go out to your entire family! Everlasting memory!
• “Words cannot express all the pain and sadness. Like a bad dream. Eternal peace to your soul, our dear and beloved Zhanna!(Grave and)
• An unfathomable loss! We all mourn the loss of ___, but of course it’s even harder for you! We sincerely sympathize with you and will remember you all our lives! We would like to provide any help you need at this moment. Count on us!
• Sad... I respect and remember ___ and am truly sorry for your loss! The least I can do today is to help in some way. At least I have four empty seats in the car.

Condolences on the death of mother and grandmother

• I was stunned by this terrible news. For me, ___ is a hospitable hostess, a kind woman, but for you... The loss of your mother... I sympathize with you so much and cry with you!
• We are very... very upset beyond words! It’s hard when you lose loved ones, but the death of a mother is a grief for which there is no cure. Please accept my sincere condolences for your loss!
• ___ was a model of delicacy and tact. Her memory will be as endless as her kindness to all of us. The passing of a mother is an incomparable grief. Please accept my deepest condolences!
• A grief incomparable to anything! And I have no words to ease your pain. But I know that she would not like to see your despair. Be strong! Tell me, what could I take on these days?
• We are happy that we knew ___. Her kind disposition and generosity surprised us all, and that is how she will be remembered! It is difficult to express our grief in words - it is too great. Let the kindest memories and bright memories of her be at least a small consolation!
• The news of ___'s departure came as a shock to us. We can only guess what a blow her departure was for you. At such moments we feel abandoned, but remember that you have friends who loved and appreciated your mother. Count on our help!
• Words cannot heal a terrible wound in the heart. But bright memories of ___, how honestly and honorably she lived her life, will always be stronger than death. In the bright memory of her, we are with you forever!
• They say they love their grandchildren even more than their children. We felt this love of our grandmother to the fullest. This love will warm us all our lives, and we will pass on some of its warmth to our children and grandchildren...
• Losing loved ones is very difficult... And the loss of a mother is the loss of a part of yourself... Mom will always be missed, but may the memory of her and the warmth of a mother always be with you!
• Words cannot heal this wound of loss. But the bright memory of ___, who lived her life honestly and with dignity, will be stronger than death. We are with you in eternal memory of her!
• Her whole life was spent in countless labors and worries. We will always remember her as such a warm-hearted and soulful woman!
• Without parents, without mother, there is no one between us and the grave. May wisdom and perseverance help you get through these most difficult days. Hold on!
• The paragon of virtue has passed away from ___! But she will remain a guiding star for all of us who remember, love and honor her.
• It is ___ that can be dedicated to kind words: “She whose actions and deeds came from the soul, from the heart.” May she rest in peace!
• The life she lived has a name: “Virtue.” ___ is the source of life, faith and love for loving children and grandchildren. The Kingdom of heaven!
• How much we didn’t tell her during her lifetime!
• Please accept my sincere condolences! What a man! ___, just as she lived modestly and quietly, she left humbly, as if a candle had gone out.
• ___ involved us in good deeds, and thanks to her we became better people. For us, ___ will forever remain a model of mercy and tact. We are happy that we knew her.
• Your mother was a smart and bright person... Many, like me, will feel that the world has become poorer without her.

Condolences on the death of husband, father, grandfather

• We are deeply saddened by the news of your father's death. He was a fair and strong man, a loyal and sensitive friend. We knew him well and loved him like a brother.
• Our family mourns with you. The loss of such reliable support in life is irreplaceable. But remember that we would be honored to help you any minute you need it.
• My condolences, ___! The death of a beloved husband is the loss of oneself. Hang in there, these are the hardest days! We mourn together with your grief, we are close...
• Today everyone who knew ___ mourns with you. This tragedy does not leave anyone close to us indifferent. I will never forget my comrade, and I consider it my duty to ___ to support you on any occasion, should you contact me.
• I'm so sorry that ___ and I had disagreements at one time. But I always appreciated and respected him as a person. I apologize for my moments of pride and offer you my help. Today and always.
• Thanks to your statements about his [qualities or good deeds], it seems to me that I have always known him. I sympathize with you about the death of such a loved one and a soul so close to you! Rest in peace…
• I am truly sorry for the loss of your dad. This is a very sad and sad time for you. But good memories are what will help you survive this loss. Your father lived a long and colorful life and achieved success and respect in it. We also join in the words of friends’ grief and memories of ___.
• I sincerely sympathize with you... What a person, what a personality! He deserves more words than can be said right now. In the memories of ___, he is both our teacher of justice and mentor in life. Eternal memory to him!
• Without a father, without parents, there is no one between us and the grave. But ___ set an example of courage, perseverance and wisdom. And I'm sure that he wouldn't want you to grieve like that right now. Be strong! I sincerely sympathize with you.
• Your shock at the onset of loneliness is a severe shock. But you have the strength to overcome grief and continue what he did not manage to do. We are nearby, and we will help with everything - contact us! It is our duty to remember ___!
• We mourn with you in this difficult moment! ___ is the kindest man, free of silver, lived for his neighbors. We sympathize with your loss and join you in the kindest and brightest memories of your husband.
• We're sorry for your loss! We sympathize - the loss is irreparable! Intelligence, iron will, honesty and justice... - we are lucky to work with such a friend and colleague! We would like to ask him for forgiveness for so many things, but it’s too late... Eternal memory to a mighty man!
• Mom, we mourn and cry with you! Our sincere gratitude from children and grandchildren and warm memories of a good father and good grandfather! Our memory of ___ will be eternal!
• Blessed are those whose memory will be as bright as ___. We will remember and love him forever. Be strong! ___ it would be easier if he knew that you could handle all this.
• My condolences! Recognition, respect, honor, and... eternal memory!
• They say about such open-hearted people: “How much of ours went with you! How much of yours remains with us! We will remember ___ forever and pray for him!

Condolences on the death of a friend, brother, sister, loved one or loved one

• Accept my condolences! It has never been more expensive or closer, and probably never will be. But in yours and in our hearts he will remain a young, strong, full of life man. Everlasting memory! Hold on!
• It is difficult to find the right words in this difficult moment. I mourn with you! Small consolation will be that not everyone has had the opportunity to experience such love as yours. But may ___ remain alive in your memory, full of strength and love! Everlasting memory!
• There is such wisdom: “It’s bad if there is no one to take care of you. It’s even worse if there’s no one to take care of you.” I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be so sad. Let's ask his mother what we can do to help her now.
• My condolences to you! Through life hand in hand, but you have suffered this bitter loss. It is necessary, it is necessary to find the strength to survive these most difficult moments and difficult days. In our memory he will remain ___.
• It is very bitter to lose your loved ones and relatives, but it is doubly bitter when young, beautiful, strong people leave us. May God rest his soul!
• I would like to find words to somehow ease your pain, but it is difficult to imagine whether such words exist on earth at all. Bright and eternal memory!
• I mourn with you in this difficult moment. It’s scary to even imagine that half of you has left. But for the sake of the children, for the sake of loved ones, we need to get through these sorrowful days. Invisibly, he will always be there - in the soul and in our eternal memory of this bright man.
• Love will not die, and the memory of it will always illuminate our hearts!
• … this too shall pass …
• For all of us, he will remain an example of love of life. And may his love for life illuminate the emptiness and grief of loss and help you survive the time of farewell. We mourn with you in difficult times and will remember ___ forever!
• The past cannot be returned, but the bright memory of this love will remain with you for the rest of your life. Be strong!
• Be strong! With the loss of your brother, you must become a support for your parents twice. May God help you get through these difficult moments! Happy memory to a bright man!
• There are such mournful words: “A loved one does not die, but simply ceases to be around.” In your memory, in your soul, your love will be eternal! We also remember ___ with a kind word.

Condolences to a believer, a Christian

All of the above is appropriate in expressing support in difficult times of loss for both the believer and the secular person. A Christian, Orthodox, can add a ritual phrase to his condolences, turn to prayer or quote from the Bible:

• God is merciful!
• God bless you!
• Everyone is alive for God!
• This man was blameless, just and God-fearing, and shunned evil!
• Lord, rest with the Saints!
• Death destroys the body, but saves the soul.
• God! Receive the spirit of your servant in peace!
• Only in death, the mournful hour, does the soul find freedom.
• God takes a mortal through life before turning him to the light.
• The righteous will certainly live, says the Lord!
• Her heart /(his) trusted in the Lord!
• Immortal soul, immortal deeds.
• May the Lord show mercy and truth to him/her!
• Righteous deeds are not forgotten!
• Most Holy Theotokos, protect him (her) with your protection!
• The days of our lives are not numbered by us.
• Everything returns to normal.
• Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God!
• Blessed peace to your ashes!
• Kingdom of heaven and eternal peace!
• And those who have done good will find the resurrection of life.
• Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven.
• And on earth she smiled like an angel: what is there in heaven?

P.S. Once again about active personal participation. For many families, even a small financial contribution to the future will be a valuable help in this difficult moment.

Funeral speech at a funeral text - farewell words spoken in memory of the deceased by his family and friends. They are pronounced over the grave of the buried with all their hearts. The speaker talks about important and significant events associated with this person, his achievements, and also speaks on the good side about the character and personality of the deceased. It is advisable if he says this orally, and not reads it from a piece of paper.

Funeral speech

Quite a lot of people attend funerals and wakes. Mostly these are relatives and friends of the deceased, but there are others - colleagues, acquaintances, school friends and others. As a rule, the head of the family or the oldest and closest person is the first to pronounce the funeral words. If he is in a strong emotional state, then others present can speak at the wake.

Funeral speech example:

“My grandmother was a wonderful person with a difficult but interesting life. She, along with her three younger brothers and sister, were raised by her mother alone during the difficult post-war years. To say that they lived poorly then would be an understatement. She had to endure many difficulties and hardships, but she never lost her optimism and presence of mind, constantly helping her mother and taking care of the younger members of the family. And later, having married her military grandfather, she steadfastly endured all the hardships of service. In any circumstances, she always maintained exemplary order at home and taught all family members to do so. Grandma was sometimes strict, but fair. I am glad that I managed to learn from her neatness and order, the ability to organize my life. And her famous apple pies were simply incomparable, no one else could do them! I will always remember you, my dear, beloved grandmother! Your warmth, love and care will remain with us forever.”

If others don’t know you well, then at the beginning of your speech you should introduce yourself and explain under what circumstances you met the deceased. The funeral speech should contain words of gratitude towards the deceased and reflect his positive qualities. You can mention any significant moment that occurred with the participation of the deceased.

Funeral words for 40 days:

“I’ll introduce myself for those who don’t know me: my name is (name). We have worked together with (name of deceased) for the past few years and I would like to say a few words in memory of him. He was a true professional in his field, a Specialist with a capital S. Many of our colleagues, young and not only, learned the basics of their craft from him and often used his advice and help. He was very patient and responsive, he could always listen to everyone who turned to him for support, advise something, help out, and never refused anyone’s requests. He could perfectly lift the spirits of anyone who was upset, confused or depressed about something. The countless funny stories, toasts, jokes and anecdotes he told could amuse anyone. We will all greatly miss him at our dinner gatherings and corporate events, where he invariably shone at the table, lifting our morale. There is no other person like him in our team. And maybe it won’t be in my memory anymore. We will all miss him greatly. Until the end of his life, he will remain in my memory and the memory of all our colleagues as an example of perseverance, sparkling cheerfulness, activity and professionalism! Rest in peace, dear colleague!”

It is advisable if you prepare the words for the wake in advance and memorize them. Because a well-formulated text will sound good and be perceived by others. And sluggish, boring speech with hesitations can be regarded as disrespect for the deceased and his family. If you are afraid that you will forget the words, you can take with you a piece of paper with a sample of the funeral speech. You need to pronounce words clearly and slowly. You need to speak confidently and so that others can hear you, but not too loudly.

Speech at a wake examples

Funeral words on the anniversary of death (from a colleague):

"Friends! The deceased worked honestly at the (name) enterprise for more than twenty years. We all knew him as a decent, honest and modest person. They were valued for their skillful hands and reliable character. We will miss his many invisible but irreplaceable contributions to the work! The bright memory of him will remain in our hearts!”

Speech at the wake 1 year (from friends):

“Friends, the best of us has gone to another world. We are all deeply saddened. Our souls are bleeding from untimely loss. The deceased was a support to all of us. He was the first to help and did not wait for requests or complaints. His kind heart and wide soul were always open. He was a clear light and guide in a difficult and dangerous world for all of us, his friends! May the soul of this magnificent man rest in peace! We will always remember him with a feeling of light sadness mixed with secret melancholy!”

Memorial speech for 40 days (from relatives):

“All his life, our father was a worthy example not only to his children, but also to those around him. In everyday life, he demonstrated a wise understanding of true values, kindness and devotion. Any person left him with an enlightened soul. And to us, his children, our father instilled a love for people, a high sense of responsibility and devotion to the Motherland. We consider his departure unfairly early. Eternal, blessed memory to him!”

“Our grandfather was a very kind and good person. His path was long and difficult. He perceived all the difficulties that befell the country as his own. He worked and raised children without complaining about the lack of benefits, lack of food or amenities. He raised children and was a support for his grandchildren. This magnificent man will be greatly missed by all of us. May his memory be blessed!”

Words of condolences are expressed not only during funerals, but also on days of remembrance of the deceased. They say a speech at funerals 40 days later, a year from the date of death, as well as during Parents' Saturdays and other Orthodox holidays. Speeches can be made both at the cemetery and during funeral dinners.

What do they say at funerals? At this event, all deceased relatives and friends are remembered. They remember what they were like during life, what they were interested in, what they loved. Words of condolences are spoken and the blessed memory of the deceased is honored. It is forbidden to say anything bad about the deceased or to recall old grievances. It’s either good or nothing, says the popular saying.

Funeral poems

In addition to the funeral speech, condolences can be expressed in poetry or toasts. These options are more suitable for a wake than for the funeral itself. For example, memorial poems are read on the anniversary of death. They can be written with your own hand or taken ready-made. If you do not have the opportunity to personally attend the wake, you can express your condolences by posting memorial poems in the newspaper.

***
Two tears fell into the flowers,
Two big, pink roses!
From my tormented soul
Hopeless tears rolled out!
They see my wet eyes
Something they don't believe in at all
What you can never change
What is measured with pain and tears!
My heart beats stubbornly
And desperately doesn't want to know
That you can no longer see your beloved eyes,
And you can no longer hug your dear ones!!!

***
You have always been an example to us,
As a person with a pure soul.
And the memory of you is alive
In the hearts and souls of your loved ones.

***
People close to us are leaving.
Do not realize that - forever,
Do not exhaust all the pain of separation,
And he hits backhand - never.

We won't see them, we won't hear them,
We won't ask, we won't talk,
Although, as before, we breathe them,
We love them, we wait for them, we adore them.

Ridiculous, strange, impossible,
That dawn has come again,
Call, scream or cry heart-rendingly,
And there are no more loved ones nearby.

***
We cannot understand or comprehend
Can't survive, can't overcome,
That the chariot of life circles,
As it was before, exactly the same.

The sun is shining and the air is so fresh,
What days it is, but it’s very sad.
Gone is the beautiful hope from hopes
And again my heart is sad and empty.
There has been silence in the apartment for six months now,
Everything there is yours and it’s hard to believe in it.
I would drink the cup of grief to the dregs,
But it still cannot be measured.
I really want to come to you again,
Kiss and just be with you.
With hope to resist in the fight,
Argue with illness and disease.
The further you go, the more immeasurable the depth
The abyss that has come between us
Like you now, like in childhood, I need you,
But it is impossible to beg with tears.
I'm strong, you know I can do it
After all, you and I have been through so much.
I am forever in your debt,
You are an eternal piece in my world.
I'll bring you flowers and stand
And the heart will touch with its wound.
And you will feel how much I love you
My beloved, only mother.

***
Memorial verses for 1 year:
You died too early
Words cannot express our pain.
Sleep, dear, you are our pain and wound,
The memory of you is always alive.

***
We come here
To put flowers,
It’s very difficult, dear,
We can live without you.

***
The Great Tribulation cannot be measured,
Tears won't help my grief.
You are not with us, but forever
You will not die in our hearts.

***
Where do all the dreams go?
And why don't they return?
How we experience pain
After all, they were happy once.
Like waking up every day
Understand that this is all reality,
How painful it is to remember that day
When everything in life changed.

***
My soul is worried without you,
You don't need girlfriends or friends.
Why is it possible without millions?
Why is it impossible without one?

***
I don't rock you in your crib
I come again to the cold fence
I will fix the fallen wreath
And I will sing to you, dear son...

***
They usually leave without saying goodbye,
Without whispering my last words,
Perhaps without going on a long journey,
On that long road of dreams and dreams.
Just yesterday they smiled sweetly at us,
Their eyes emitted a bright light,
And as always, waiting for us to visit,
We dreamed of giving our friendly advice.
They, like all of us, really wanted to live,
And every moment brought them joy,
We didn’t have time to do everything we wanted to do,
They still had so much strength.
At some point, everything broke off,
Someone from above told them their deadline,
The soul rushed about in confusion,
That she didn’t even have time to tell us a few words.
Even if they are not with us, we love them,
And we remember joyful days,
And our heart will never forget them,
It’s as if they are somewhere nearby.

***
We are sad and sad
And there are no other feelings.
Let's remember all the parents,
Let's remember all our relatives!

Let's remember all those who have passed away,
In the prime of his life,
Brothers and sisters of the dead,
Friends and strangers!

They once lived
And they made us happy
Laughed and loved
They took care of us.

A long time ago or recently
They are no longer with us
And reverently to the grave
We bring a bouquet!

In fast-flowing time
We don’t remember other things,
But you are family to us
More than alive!

We ask You, Lord,
About mercy alone,
Forgive their sins, Lord,
May their souls rest!
***
Among those who love there is agreement
Among the lonely there is only pain
Among those deceived by love - revenge
And among the dead - memory and separation

***
Death took you away on a path of no return
And brought me beyond the boundaries of existence.
Here I dissolved in the quiet echo of the alarm
A life lived “in Russian” is yours.
And all that was in the heart before was pain and rage,
Dreams, hopes, faith and love -
In the space of space it suddenly invisibly disintegrated,
But maybe it will be reborn in someone again.
And there are white-trunked birches near the grave,
When the moon is silent in the night,
Tears and dew fall before the clear dawns of the earth,
That the mother's eyes did not drain to the bottom.

***
Your watch has stopped. how you didn’t want to leave!!!
But the heart has stopped beating, and we can’t bring you back,
You've been through a lot in your life,
War and famine, but you survived in spite of everyone.
Your clock ticks in your friends' houses, everyone loved you! you've always been lucky!
Giving life to your family’s watches, you poured your breath into them.
You lubricated their hearts and eased the hours of suffering.
But you couldn’t help yourself, and it’s useless to lubricate your heart.
I didn’t win this fight, I gave it all, I gave it all for free.
We gave you the warmth of our hearts, and we were always with you,
Our dear grandfather, father-in-law, father and father-in-law,
You were so afraid to be alone, you were so afraid to be with yourself.
But the black hag came to you, swinging her scythe and hitting you straight in the heart.
The clock has stopped, but the soul
Stayed with us, we are always with you, we are together.
February, frost, trees without leaves, and we haven’t learned to live without you.
You wanted to be with us so much, but alas
Your watch has stopped...

Funeral toasts

Funeral toasts at a wake are usually said at the table. They do not necessarily specify the identity of the deceased. You can express general condolences to all the deceased:

The grandfather sat in heaven and wept bitterly. A boy came up to him and asked why he was grieving. The old man answered him:
- There is a custom on earth - to drink for the repose of our souls. And then we are always full and with a full jug of wine. We are glad that the children remember us. And now I have an empty jug and that’s why I’m sad.
So let's drink to those who are not with us!

Friends, today is a day of sorrow. There was a time when we had fun and rejoiced with someone who left us. But today you and I drink this cup of sorrow ourselves, seeing off a person close to us on their last journey. Not everyone in the world was honored with the Dormition, like the Mother of God and other holy people. But we will keep in our hearts the good memory of our friend, having hope for resurrection and a new meeting in a new place. Let's drink to the dregs the wine of sadness!

In a wolf pack, the leader suddenly died without leaving a will. The wolves announced a meeting to elect a new leader. For three days they argued and squabbled, because each was afraid that the new leader would begin to take revenge on those who voted against him. When they were already hoarse from screaming, the old wise wolf stood up and said:
- Let's choose someone from outside our pack to be an impartial leader.
Everyone agreed and asked who. Then the wise old wolf suggested choosing a goat as leader. The wolves began to be indignant:
- We just didn’t have enough goats yet!
But the wise old wolf explained:
- Even though he is a goat, he has one advantage: if he starts causing chaos, he can always be bullied.
The wolves agreed with a laugh and called the goat. When they brought the goat trembling with fear, they said to him:
- Listen carefully! We will choose you as our leader if you don’t act like a jerk.
The goat became even more frightened and replied:
- I'm a goat. But I renounce my asshole past. I swear I will never be an asshole again.
The wolves made an approving noise and dedicated the goat to their leader.
“Now you are our leader,” said the old wise wolf. - You can order us whatever you want, and we will obey. Our fate is in your hands.
All the wolves, with their tails between their legs, nodded affirmatively and asked the goat to make a speech. The goat quickly jumped onto the rock, spread his legs wider, fluffed out his beard, stuck out his horns, looked around the silent flock with a slow gaze and bleated sternly:
- Well, which one of us is the goat?
So let's remember our glorious leaders!

Toasts at a wake can also be expressed in poetic form:

Blessed memory of those who have left us,
Let's drink to this now.
Let it be like granite in our hearts,
Preserves the memory of loved ones who have passed away.
Let all the good things that happened to them
A damp grave will not bury you.
No matter how long we keep the memory,
He will live with us for that long.

Funeral notes

You can also honor the memory of the deceased with the help of memorial notes. In churches there is a special table where there is a sample memorial note on which you can write it. A cross is placed at the very top of the sheet and marked “for repose.” Then the full names of the deceased are written in the genitive case and in church spelling (for example, Ivan - John), neatly and legibly. Usually about ten to fifteen names are written. Moreover, everyone who is written there must be baptized in the Orthodox Church.

In addition to the names, the note indicates which deceased person is: newly deceased - deceased for forty days after death or ever-memorable (worthy of constant remembrance) - deceased who has a memorable date on this day.

When going to a funeral or wake, it is important to remember etiquette. You need to behave delicately and tactfully. It is worth preparing words of condolences, which can be expressed through a funeral speech, memorial poems or toasts. An appropriate and competent speech will be appreciated with gratitude by the family and friends of the deceased.

Consult a specialist - right now!